And To Ride A Horse

Willowgrove Show

2010-08-24T18:29:00.002-06:00

This is way late but I've been crazy busy getting ready to move, moving, and then settling in.

The show was absolutely fantastic. Ringo loaded decently. He put on the brakes for a few minutes but then conceded to me and came in. I drove the trailer to the show, which went well. We also took Brae who loaded like a freaking pro. Just walked right in. We had some fun trying to find the stalls. I met Aly for the second time. She was super nice and I got to know her a bit better throughout the show. We were in the aisle next to Stoddart to so all my friends from there were nice and close.

Anyways, we got the horses and everything unloaded and set up, and then I got ready to ride. Amanda wanted me to just hop on without lunging him, so I did. Surprisingly (I expected craziness) Ringo was faaaantastic. He was a little fresh but nothing bad at all. The kids (except Brittany) all rode too (there was Cheeno and Sonny). We warmed up in the big sand ring, then headed down to the hunter ring. I did the little fences to warm up (like 2'6-2'9) and I guess Sonny's girl thought she should do the same and basically copied me. Amanda was like OMFG DID YOU JUST JUMP THAT. But she was fantastic. Sonny loves her - Aly had schooled him and Cheeno (Sonny for spookyness and Cheeno for his thinking he was a jumper) and he was not the best. We were all going.... oookay holy crap lol.

We put the fences up to my height after a long while and schooled. It went really well!

I stayed at the show with Monie and her family (as well as Erin's best friend Nicole). It was great not having to drive; I got to sleep in a lot longer too!

I did night check and took all the horses for their walks. It was great.

The second day was the first day of showing. I got up early to braid Ringo (Aly cleaned all the stalls thank gooood) and photographed all the little jumpers and hunters. I rode in the 3'3" Modifieds and J/Am's as well. It was fannnntastic, even though my division had like 5 or 6 people in it. It was still so much fun. The medal was really hard - we had to hand gallop then halt, stop in a line and canter out, and answer a question. It was tons of fun! Ringo was superb! We won a bunch of firsts and seconds, but got third in the medal (that had 6 or 7 in it though - and my competition was actually pretty damn nice!).

The best part was the A Eq on the flat - it was just Monie and I. The judge (Aly's coach incidentally) made us sit the trot, hand gallop, simple change, and more. It was the hardest eq on the flat I've ever done (not saying much considering all the others have been ridiculously easy but...). Simone beat me, haha. It was super awesome.

The next day I had three flats which I progressively did better in (not enough warm up I think, plus I didn't like his bit...), then two 3'3"s and a 2 3'6"s. It went SOOOO well. Ringo was fantastic. We won champion in the 3'6"s, champion in the modified 3'3"s and reserve champion in the j/am 3'3"s. I was so proud of him. We won a cooler, leadline, and backpack too. I was so happy and my parents actually came to see - first time my mom had seen me ride in YEARS. It was great.

Sunday I got eliminated. Ringo was just exhausted. He stopped at the first oxer. I didn't hit him or yank or anything. I just turned him and got him over. I was gonna pull up but ... He then stopped at the next oxer. Kip got mad at me for stopping riding, but I knew he wasa exhausted. In the warmup ring he had had a few baaaad stops - uphill over oxers. He had no juice at all - and I had given him oats for the last two days. Still not enough.

Overall the show was fantastic. Ringo was good. I felt I kinda rode like shit - it was Ringo who won everything not me, really. I found I knew pretty much everyone and was constantly talking to someone. I took a lot of decent pictures of everyone too, which is nice. Monie got some fabulous ones of me too =).

All in all a GREAT experience. I loved my barn and Amanda especially. I got to spend time with Matthew (her one year old son) too and he is sooooo cute. Amanda's boyfriend left her soon after the show (5months pregnant and with a one year old...........) and was a jerk about it. It made me lose hope in boys once again. Isn't it sad I can't even picture a guy liking a girl? Or being in love? All I've seen is heartbreak or something like Jess/Tim (don't even get me started on THAT).

Moving has been going well. I love my new room so much. The furniture and the bathroom and the windows and light - everything is just me. We printed out some of my photography so we have lots of photos up. I still have some legit artwork to put up but Napoleon is above my bed and my grandma's painting of Ringo is up as well.

Finding a barn has been awful. The main english barn has apparently shut down because of the flooding and I have no clue if it's opening again. One other barn is full. The one I did like is too small, and the reining lady was nuts and very rude and didn't want me anyways. I've left messages at three barns and one of them I'm going to see Thursday. I hope to GOD it works out!

I'm off though. <3

2010-07-31T23:33:00.002-06:00

Wow, so long time no writing. Basically the last few months have been totally packed. It's been wake up, do some kind of errand, go to work, ride two or three horses, go to bed, possibly hang out with David before then, lol. But anyways, I'll probably do an update by horse or something lol.

Stormy
Well, he got 'fixed' by the chiropractor vet, and she started riding him again, kinda. Then there was a death in the family and I rode him in my dressage lesson (well actually, I came from work totally confused and totally forgot I had a lesson and he was the horse I was tacking up, soo...). He was a bit fresh but was decent until I really sat down and picked up a connection. He had a complete meltdown - rearing, bolting, bucking, EVERYTHING. We did an entire hour of one-rein stops, working on getting them less abrupt and getting him to be CALM and stop fighting. At first he tried very hard to get me off, but he slowly improved. We would walk or trot (later on) after we straightened out and if he got out of control or trotted a while we'd do it again. We also rubbed him - he HATED that. He wouldn't LOOK at me or Steph, and would pretty much either move away or totally freak when we rubbed him either on the face or the neck. By the end he was walking and trotting nicely, and letting us touch him, and had maybe looked at me once.

I love his owner to bits, but it is so frustrating when people just get on, canter, jump, get off. She seriously barely trots him, and never asks him to really use himself. Lateral work - maybe there's a single leg yield. Stormy has the potential to be a very nice horse, but he needs an overhaul - and that's believing his bucking isn't learned and was purely from pain. She's moving him, but as it's the 31st and he's still not gone... she's barely ridden in the last 2-3 weeks, anyways. -sigh-

Brae
Poor brae and her owner. They got her injected as she has some form of degenerative disease that was being managed by injections (it was in the pasterns?). Two weeks later she was dead lame - and she's 11, 12 at MOST. It's so sad. She's perma-lame. My trainer's niece has been just flatting her, and that's been going well. They were planning to buy her (suuuper cheap obviously and with all her tack) just so Brae's current owner could stop the monthly fees (she had literally just decided to sell her due to lack of time/money), but her parents don't want to have to deal with her when she's too lame to do ANYTHING (pasture or put down basically). But the young girl is taking to her a little BRAVE show, so hopefully that'll go well. I don't know what Brae's current owner is going to do now though... it's either keep paying or put her down or give her to someone - and that's super risky as slaughter is still legal here. Poor brae =(

Revel
I've been riding my trainer's 3 year old stallion and it's been going pretty well. I haven't ridden in him in just over a week because of another incident (-sigh-) but he was okay. It was weird. He was doing really well with jumping - we were jumping 2'3", and he was leaving things decently up and not stopping, then the last time they were lower and he stopped at EVERYTHING. Granted they were the newly painted indoor jumps, but it was ridiculous. And it was just like 'no'. He wasn't dirty about it really - and I could KICK and growl, but it was truly him who decided. I talked to Amanda tonight and she's decided he just isn't into jumping - he's a dressage horse. He is super lovely though. He's also a little shit - he escaped the other day by pushing the rails out of the indoor arena (he had been turned out beside it to be a lawn mower) and took off down the road. At a leisurely walk. Poor barn owners - they were totally panicking and stuff. It ended up he'd wandered about 2km down the road and the people there caught him and tied him up. He was found - he was totally fine too. Well mostly. He wasn't stressed or sweaty, but he managed to catch his face on some kind of nail or something and scratched it a little. Luckily it missed his eye though.

He also loves to destroy his boots and blankets. It's kind of ridiculous... lol I love him though. He's super sweet.

Q T Pie
The little colt of Amanda's came, and boy is he cute! He looks more like a 6 month year old then a yearling, but whatever. He's super friendly, well mannered, and quiet. The barn owners bought him!!! He's out with all the other horses and they all LOVE him - protect him and play with him - it's cute!

Kaz
He's doing soooo well on the flat - it's amazing. He's so relaxed now, and gets better and better. He's got gorgeous gaits and is always moving properly, round, on the bit, and really attentive. It's absolutely crazy the change in him - in only a few months. Wow. Jen hasn't been able to ride much because of her absolutely retarded job (long hours without notice... it's silly). But she's almost done her practicum! Woo hoo! BTW Polar is also doing well. Jen jumped him (just over a single fence) to see how he was - he was SO excited! Aww <3

Roan
Roanie's been really good. Her canter still needs a LOT of work, but she's come SO far. She now moves OFF the leg (and opening rein... she responds to that beautifully!). She leg yields (not 100% yet, obviously, but still... at first she just went FORWARD and had no idea of anything!). I am SO proud of her. And she jumps like a little champ! She doesn't hesitate at all, and she is so nice to ride.

Her feet were uber long and FINALLY done, and she's quite sore the last few days - particularly on the front left. Tonight we just walked and worked on leg yielding, opening reins, turn on the haunches, and that kind of thing. She was super <3. She isn't going into the show unfortunately, because of money issues. Which really sucks because she could use the experience (plus it would be SO fun), but it works out for the best because a) she's lame and may not be better, b) it would be a lonnnng day.

So hopefully she gets better asap. I need to talk to her owner about August and if she wants me to continue riding her.

Fuzzy
Simone and him had an okay show at Anderson's. It was probably their worst ever but they still did decently. Now though, he's going out to pasture for a while. They are constantly UP and DOWN, and he was stopping and they've just been out of sync. I dunno. I'm concerned about Monie because of certain irresponsibilities that occurred, but I just need to let it go. It still REALLY galls me that she won't go to the doctor for me, but whatever. i have to let it go...

Annnnd RINGO!

So Ringo has been going FANTASTICALLY. We've been jumping 4'0"+. He's been absolutely brilliant. He's been forward, and going SO nicely. Last saturday, however, it was a baddd lesson. He stopped at this weird striped jump (well he jumped it the first time, then stopped (3'6"ish btw)), then DIRTY stopped, and I got after him. Then he just LIT up, and was jumping the jumps like they were ... I don't even know. It was like he was PISSED off - I think he was. I did a bending line and he did the quiet 4 in two and half, then jumped me half-out of the tack, and took off bucking. He bucked me off (including my stirrup pad..... wtf lol) and I twisted, landing on my back. The same place as last time, and injured the same place as last time. I also knocked the wind out of myself. That was the scariest part, fighting for breath. My back hurt like a BITCH but it was nowhere near as bad as last time. I got back on but could only walk. Jen came out (with a bag on her head as she was in the middle of dying her hair LOLOLOL) to school him. Amanda lowered all the fences and Jen took him over. He was TERRIBLE for her. He stopped once, was dropping his shoulder, and was totally behind her leg. I really think he doesn't like her.

I didn't ride as I had to recover, but on Wednesday I got back on. He was FABULOUS. Amanda and Jen had ridden him each once for me, then I had lunged him the once as well. The next day I had a lesson inside which was okay. He was taking off quite long (the jumps were 3'0") and was NOT changing leads over the diagonal - over the fence or on landing. He was cross cantering and it took a while to fix him. He just wasn't straight.

Tonight I had a lesson outside and I rode in a double bridle. He seemed to like it, and I did too, but it wasn't 'sharp' enough for jumping I think - I would need just a LITTLE more.

We did a little warm up, then did a course - the green and white striped jump off the right on the left (facing the gate) side of the ring, then around the corner over the neapolitan jump, bending line to an oxer, into a REALLY tight turnback back over the neapolitan, then back to the trot, across the diagonal over a bounce, around the corner across the diagonal over the zebra jump, bending line to the neapolitian, and then left up the quarter line over the canada jump. He was super good (especially the first fence) he jumped fantastically. HE stopped once at the striped when it went up, but he jumped it fine the opposite way. He kept cross cantering on the one diagonal line so we had to do that a few times. He was just throwing his haunches to the outside before the fence then ignoring my leg and such. I had to PUSH his hind quarters over to the left (new inside) before the diagonal fence for him to land the lead.

I entered the show. I'm doing the Modified and Juniour Am 3'3"s, and the J/A 3'6"s, as well as two hunter classics, and the A Equitation flat and over fences. I'm really hoping it goes well. -crosses fingers-

We've been prepping for Lethbridge a lot. We've got mostly everything now, all we need is lighting and just food stuff for the kitchen. I'm so excited to move and get organized and stuff. It's crrrrrazy. David is listed as my 'spouse' on my costco card hahaha. Oh well. I love him <3

Anyways, I'm typing this on my b-day/grad present a 15" mac book pro <33333 I LOVE it. Seriously. LOVE it.

I'm off gotta work tomorrow.

Just A Rant, Don't Read

2009-01-27T17:26:00.003-07:00

I honestly don't deserve what I have - my friends, Ringo, good parents, all that stuff. I don't deserve any of it. My friends are so so so amazing, and I don't deserve that, them. They constantly amaze me, and I wonder what they're doing with ME. I mean I'm not going to go fishing for compliments and say I have NOTHING good about me or NO talents or whatever, but honestly, I have a lot of faults. And I mean, everyone does, right? But like, you know, I accepted the way I look. I actually have, with a few times (like normal) that I go, aw crap, wish I looked better, but I always go, 'whatever' and move on with life. I'm not really shallow. To me, personality and intelligence are way more important than looks or appearance. I'm not stupid, I know that, but sometimes I wish I was smarter. Like actually. Or at least not a procrastinator - that is one of my New Years Resolutions. To not procrastinate. I'm not doing to badly, actually, but we'll see how second semester goes.

But like, in personality, while I KNOW I have assets, I have a lot of glaringly obvious faults - and the stupid thing is, I don't know how to fix them or change them. This whole post is complete evidence of my self-criticalness and selfishness. I can't tell you how annoying it is, but this is better than telling someone.

There's also..stuff, I feel towards people. I can't stand it.

I don't even know where I'm going with this, except I feel like an undeserving person. I hope my friends abandon me or whatever, because that's what I deserve, truly.

New Years

2009-01-01T22:02:00.002-07:00

So 2008 is over. Wow. It was a HUGE year for me. And Ringo too. We overcame even more, and actually did really well. We've gained so much ground...

Then there was the boyfriend, England, band stuff, school, drama....But it was a really good year. The best of my life so far, I'd have to say. Wow.

So Ringo got not quite two weeks off (I worked him at a few points in there...So it was less then 10 days, broken up, but still) right before Christmas. Mostly because of the weather, which was REALLY, REALLY cold, and snowy (over a foot and a half now I think!). It was pretty sweet. But then Ringo hurt himself. Multiple times. How? Well he somehow cut right over his eye, but that wasn't too bad. Cleaned it up and it was fine and dandy... Then he was apparently grabbing onto Courage's blanket, and NOT letting go - even though Courage was kicking the crap out of his legs. Thank god he didn't have shoes.

So Ringo's got scabs all over his front legs, occasional swellings, there was heat, and he was lame for a day or so. He's still a little stiff sometimes but they seem to be healing, thank god. My deformed little klutz horse...

He's hacked excellently this week, and we had a pretty good lesson. My back is bothering me a lot again, unfortunately. I HAVE to do something about it soon....

I went to Monie's for New Years Eve, which was nice. Quiet and stuff, but fun. The next day we went to her barn and I rode Fuzzy. He was tons of fun - I really enjoyed it. His changes are HILARIOUS - he kicks out, sideways. It's super funny. He tested me a bit, but I passed.

We watched Jay O'Jay work with Broc, and his own horse, Cisco. It was pretty cool, I must say, and I really like him.

Went to the barn with Monie but my back was/is killing me...and the rest of my body too, from pushing my truck to get it unstuck on the way to Monies (note: don't take backroad shortcuts in winter). Yeah....

So for 2009 I have some goals, mainly to get my Eq right and to finally win a class. At some point. I don't care which one lol. The bigger the better, of course. But anyways...

I'm off since Monie is still here. <3

Musical And Injuries

2008-12-17T23:43:00.004-07:00

So the musical ended tonight. It was so much fun. I hated it until the first Saturday performance - then it all came together. Everyone did such a great job! I loved being part of the pit, and playing the accordion was AWESOME! I did like arranging things too, but there was just SO many songs...

Tomorrow is band concert. I've had something every night. I was at school from just BEFORE 8AM-9PM on Monday (dress rehearsal). It was crazy.

We have also been getting WINTER! SNOW! BLIZZARD! COLD (-30 without windchill....and we were the only school in rockyview that had school!! AH!). It's pretty awesome, but I had to miss FOUR days at the barn. I came out on Tuesday, and Ringo had a HUGE cut above his eye, four cuts on his front legs, swelling in both knees, additional swelling and heat in the right fore, and a few more small scrapes. I was like WTF.

Apparently he grabbed hold of Courage's blanket and would NOT let go - held on, dragged him BACKWARDS, and STOOD there when Courage kicked him. Again. And Again.

My horse goes insane when I don't go out. He's retarded.

But he isn't lame! I free lunged yesterday, and we ran together, and today I rode for a bit. He was super!

So there was this thing with Eric - he flirited wiht me so much (so that I thought and JESS thought he liked me). So I got all excited about that. Now I'm like, 99.5% sure he doesn't like me. But he flirted with me tonight a lot. It's kinda frustrating.

Then the whole HIM thing. Ugh. It's stupid. I hate it. But I can't get out of it.

I'm thankfully over the Jess and Tim thing - us three are a LOT closer.

My mom FREAKED at me tonight for no good reason. She didn't come to my play. Ugh. It's just...frustrating. I tried removing myself from the situation and she just screamed at me and followed me. It's like... how can I be mature if you won't be?

I got grounded from doing anything but school and barn (cause god forbid I get driven to the barn...). Whatever. I'm taking Dina and Christina out tomorrow. It'll be my last chance, and she can't stop me.

It's Been A While

2008-12-07T17:10:00.002-07:00

I haven't updated in a while, mostly because I've been so busy. I have two weeks left before Christmas break. Yay. Lol. My cousins are actually coming for christmas this year - I haven't seen them in four years. It'll be crazy, and hopefully good.

We're in the middle of a HUGE snowstorm. Emphasis on snow. There's over 6 inches - maybe a foot?? It's awesome. I drove to the barn and was sliding everywhere and all that. It was crazy. Ringo was good today too - I rode bareback and worked on straightness.

Speaking of straight, Ringo and I have made a HUUUUUGE breakthrough on that area. Finally. We jumped a 4'0 vertical on our own the other day (right before the big breakthrough) and it was incredible. He jumped the HELL out of that fence, no lie. The next day we jumped a 3'6 oxer and a 3'9 vertical. Holy crap. He's being amazing.

So I met another guy, I guess. Well I've known him for a while. But we went out with two of my friends, and had a really really good time. Eek.

Ironically I started liking him at band camp. Exactly a year after I started liking my last boyfriend. Yikes. Freaky. Band camp knows all apparently. Lol.

So that's about it. Byes.

Updates

2008-11-16T20:05:00.002-07:00

So Ringo is better from his slight injury. I ended up not calling the vet cause it went through it's cycle and he wasn't lame. So you know.

Lessons have been going good.

Two people have left my trainer because of her new partnership. It's really sad because having two trainers that work together like that on it's own is good - you get double the opinion. Plus she has TONS to offer, but she expects you to work hard. So whatever.

School is going okay, over 2/3 done my first semester...yay! Band is going well. I did another clinic for my band teacher, and it was tons of fun. It made me really want to do music education for university again. -sighs-

I want to take english, history, music, psychology...lol...

My best friend is dating one of my closest guy friends now. I'm super happy for both of them, especially since no matter what it'll be good for them. It's kinda weird though, because sometimes I feel used, especially since I can drive.

Actually I've been feeling used quite often lately, something I've rarely felt before.

But whatever.

I dunno. I'm not in a ranting mood, for once. LOL.

Realizations

2008-11-03T00:32:00.002-07:00

So it's been pretty action-packed.

Lessons have been going well. We worked on using the haunches in the last lesson, and before that it was the same thing. Getting Ringo to use his self, and my position. He's doing really well!

I spent four hours at the barn today, it was pretty awesome! I rode Ringo (after a thorough grooming), and he was awesome. We did shoulders/haunches in/out, half passes, all that lovely stuff. I love it when the ring has NOTHING in it. You can do anything.

Yeah, I rode outside. It's been SO nice recently! The nicest halloween weather EVER! I wish it had been this nice when I went trick or treating.

I wanted to dress Ringo up as a Beatle (read Ringo Starr) but I figured there was no point, lol.

The band concert was alright. My parents decided not to come. Thanks for the support. My costume was pretty spiffy-ish. I was a vampire. A LOT of people dressed up this year it seemed, and there were some awesome costumes. My 'friend' decided not to come to the concert either...disappointing.

After the concert Emma, Jess, and Krista came over to my house. After we went to Tim Hortons and had this random photo take. It was so much fun. Cold. But fun.

We talked, a LOT. About guys, life, other stuff. I love having them over. It was the first time all four of us have actually had a sleepover. We stayed up till 3AM, hahaha. We are awesome, I know.

My 'friend' and I also had a long talk. A girl told him she liked him, and he went into this rant about friendships, and then went into a rant about how they suck at making them.

I realized a lot of things.

Mainly me and this friend were not going to happen, and that everyone (read guy friends) are right: I AM delusional. Me and my 'friend' are amazing friends - but that's all he'll ever see me as.

I was fine till we turned out the lights. I tried very hard not to disturb anyone while I fought my tears. I won.

We had a surprise party for Emma the next morning! It was awesome! She didn't have a clue. I finally met her other friends, which was kinda nice.

We had lots of fun, we played capture the flag, took a lot of pictures, it was all good.

I managed until I just had Krista to drop off. Then I hugged her and it honestly felt if I let go I would be lost. So we talked for a bit. After my initial 'outburst' I was fine.

Then to the barn. Ringo was very hyper, and nearly bucked me off. I tried going on the trails, the outdoor ring (he did well in there) and then a cool off (he was fine till I did a circle, then it was BUCK BUCK WEEEE!). But it was okay. He was there for me, for the most part. I was a little, uh, upset.

Then Saturday came and I realized more things. I was sad still, but... better. Yes, I still have STRONG (love?) feelings for him, but I'll be okay. And only I can determine that.

I spent the night with friends. We were really tired. I watched the Shining. Crreeeeeepy.

Sunday the time change messed me up. I was in a state of confusion till about uh... yeah. Oh well. It's late.

Fly Away

2008-10-22T22:48:00.002-06:00

What if all I want to do is fly away?

Leave it ALL behind?

Maybe correspond to a few people by letters - or not even that.

I just want to be free - of everything. Of the drama, of the hurt, of all the rules.

I want you ALL to be happy - but obviously that isn't going to happen.

And selfishly enough, what I want most is you. I want you to make me laugh. To talk to me. To hold me when all I feel like doing is crying. I hate that I'm so dependent, so... I don't even know. I hate that I miss you so much. That I NEED to talk to you. That I WANT you in so many ways.

I hate that I can't tell you this. I hate that you're almost all I think about. I hate that it still hurts. I hate that I think I'm in love. I hate that you never think about me. I hate that I'm nothing more than an annoyance to you.

I wonder why I can't be more? Is it me? You? The times? Will it ever be?

I don't know.

I don't know anything anymore.

And then YOU are being all secretive and stuff. Like...?? You're supposed to tell me everything.

Actually, I don't even want to know. But I pretend interest. Yet you tell her and him everything before you even mention it to me. And you were so indifferent today? And like... WEIRD.

And I'm so scared for you. So so scared. Please be okay. I love you so much. You're scaring me. They'll be others.

I guess that's true for me too. I just need to get over it. Right.

ETA:
And you. I look forward to talking to you so much. SO much. And then I feel that horrible realization of I really don't matter to you.

I am so lonely right now.

I'd Be Lost

2008-10-19T19:21:00.002-06:00

So it seems like two of my closest friends are getting together.

I think it'll be good for both of them, no matter what happens as they are both not used to those feelings, and are very logical and even unemotional. I'm afraid that might be what keeps them apart.

She really likes him. So much.

He really likes her, so much.

I am so very happy for them, and hopeful.

And on the other hand, I'm jealous, kinda. In a way. Not of them - although me and the guy kind of have a bit of a romantic past, I haven't like him for a LONG time ago, and he's just one of my closest friends, and not because I'm afraid he's 'stealing' her away from me or anything.

It's because I want that so badly. I had that, and I lost it.

That's what hurts the most. I can't even watch movies, watch people I know, STARE OUT THE FREAKING WINDOW SOMETIMES! without being reminded of something. And it's not like I'm TRYING to hold on. I've wanted to get over it so bad. I'm not unhappy either - it's just something that's hanging on, not letting me let go.

I want to say it's...THAT. But how can I know that? I'm too young. It was the first.

Yet a part of me disagrees.

I dunno.

And I'm so worried about my friend. She's so unhappy. I don't know what to do about it. I really, really don't.

I took Ringo out on a trail ride today. He was good. We galloped - flat out. He takes me anywhere - he lets me fly. I love him more than anything else in this whole world. I would be lost without him.

Not Knowing

2008-10-13T21:48:00.001-06:00

Is the worst thing. I'd rather know then not know. Ignorance is bliss, yes, but sooner or later it's going to happen - and it's much better knowing the FULL story rather then half or the minimal. At least to me.

I hate that I feel this. Not that ^^. But just...in general. I want this so badly, but I'm not going to get it. I can't tell if these feelings are REAL, SUPER-REAL (as in the BIG deal), or just a stupid first/highschool crush thing. I can't. And it's driving me mad. Especially this hot/cold thing. For god sakes.

Something More

2008-10-10T23:24:00.002-06:00

I had an awesome lesson last night. It was a private, with Larissa, and it was AWESOME. It felt a little weird because I had ridden Ringo, then Mindy the previous night, and Mindy is SO fat and SO smooth... Lol.

But Ringo was really good. We jumped 4'0". No lie. It was AWESOME. Ringo was flying - and he was WET after the lesson. Well not totally soaked, but wet enough! Larissa said she was really proud of me and thought I did an awesome job at the show. Yay!

Last night was also the Homecoming. He came, and played with us as did a few other grade 12's. Or ex ones..I mean. Ugh.

The London trip brought us all so close. I miss them, even the ones I didn't know very well. =(

I spent the day with Jess, Emma, and Krista. We got our halloween costumes. We're going to look AWESOME. Emma and I went to the barn after, and that was fun. We then went to her house. I LOVE her family. They are so cute. And they have an ADORABLE little kitten they rescued! She is SO tiny and SO cute!!!

Emma and I talked a LOT. We talked about Derek, Ken, love, Krista, the play, jess, EVERYTHING. It was really fun. I enjoyed it a lot. It's the first time it's really been just us two, and it was nice. I'm really glad she's my friend.

I'm going to experiment with the layout and stuff of the blog. Weee! haha.

Medal Finals

2008-10-06T00:03:00.002-06:00

Day 1, Wednesday:
Ringo loaded and trailered well. He went on second try! Yay! He didn't sweat or anything throughout the ride so that was good. The road right before Amberlea was AWFUL - like bone jarring bumpy. Yuck.

So once we got there and unpacked, Alison, Carli and I hacked indoors. It was good. Ringo listened very well and was a good boy =).

Amberlea is a really nice facility. The tournament was indoors (except the CET and Mini- Medal dressage tests), and so was the stabling. Our stalls were okay. Big, solid. The only issue I had with them was it was DARK and the floor was dirt and slightly uneven. But it was pretty good. Ringo was on the end, next to Callie, then there was the feed stall, then Joey, then Riley, and then Fleet was right by the door.

We settled into our hotel...nothing much happened, lol.

Day 2, Thursday:
So today was schooling day! It was fun! Ringo did well, we were a little weak to our first fences but it was okay. He didn't freak out, even though all of Jumpstart was schooling, and there were four or five horses waiting at one end to start their schooling. I was proud!

We went out for lunch (I think? Lol it's all running together) which was nice. I cleaned tack (I was really good about it this weekend...), did Ringo's stall, organized some stuff. You know. I also braided. Put his slinky on. Haha.

Day 3, Friday (First Day of Competition):
So today was Eq day...
The competition was a lot tougher then I'm used to. Plus our division had 21 or 23 people in it. Which is actually pretty big for a FINAL. It's bigger than the last two shows I've been at, haha.

So I got on Ringo early and rode him before the ring was closed for competition.

Well.

We had a MAJOR freakout - he was acting like POLAR. He jumped straight up, he bucked, he kicked out, he SPUN, he went backwards, he went sideways, he jigged, he THREW his front feet out and stomped - JUST like Polar... - and threw a hissy fit. Others were in there warming up. I think Ringo dislikes chaos. That MUST be it. Or chaos in enclosed spaces anyways...

So we worked through it - I got him trotting forward, at least. Then we went outside to warm up some more. He was good.

Our eq on the flat was okay - I thought the announcer was the judge (I thought that's where the judge was sitting...) so I did all the "judge shouldn't see" things where the ANNOUNCER couldn't see. Plus my rein was WAY too long. But Ringo was surprisingly good - he didn't freak or anything! Yay!

Our Eq over fences was okay. Not stellar. Our low was crappy. I accidentally did an extra fence. LOL.

We went out to dinner that night, and it was fun.

Day 4, Saturday:
Medal Phase 1 Day! We had a low as well. I rode pretty crappily. Ugh.

It was alright. I lost pace in the corners, I was leaning, my legs weren't still, and my reins were too long. I was kinda upset cause I know I can ride better, and I know Ringo and I can do better.

In our warm up he was pretty riled up and gave a few bucks. A horse was being lunged in the ring next to us and that of course distracted my boy. Lol.

Day 5, Sunday:
Today was our best day. The weather was cooler and it was all misty and foggy - I wish I had time to take pictures with my camera. Seriously, it was awesome.

I got on early to work the kinks out of Ringo.

I ended up having a mini-lesson with Decia - getting him STRAIGHT and round. It worked! And it was amazing. I need to keep my hands farther apart, higher, and USE MY LEG!!

We walked for a bit, then I walked the course, then warmed up. Our last warm-up fence was the best.

My course was pretty good. It looked better than it felt. There was one spot I let him get behind my leg (right before the two stride, in the tight corner), so that was a bit rough, but the rest was pretty good. I got a score of 68 (which sucks, but...oh well). I ended up getting 7th! =).

After the awards we packed up and got Ringo ready to go. Said goodbye, checked out (I kept my number...shhh....lol) and left. Ringo loaded awesomely! I was so proud of him.

We stopped in Red Deer for food and I opened his door and hung out with him. About four people came over - one took his and my picture, and I took her picture with him, and a couple came over to chat - they were thinking about buying a horse and an acreage (the wife road for many years). It was cool, lol. Ringo enjoyed the attention, but he was more eager to get home.

We got home, I took off his stuff (he was VERY impatient...) and he took off with his buddies. Didn't do much running...just ate grass. LOL.

So all in all, it was a good learning experience. I enjoyed it up there, and it was really cool to do. It was my first out of town show, my first finals...it was cool. I still really don't have very much show experience, so I guess this is really a big accomplishment. I'm very proud of my boy - and I LOVE that I don't get scared or anything when he freaks. It's nothing. I LOVE that. I spent sooo long being so scared of him, falling, freaking horses, that it's so nice to not feel that anymore. Yay!

So anyways, I JUST finished most of my homework. I'll be behind on Chem but I have Friday off this week so I can catch up. I'm hoping to spend time with the girls too.

I am not looking forward to school in seven and a half hours. UGH!

I am SO tired. And I ended up hurting my back. Apparently I have a pinched nerve and stuff. It's fun. It hurts. A lot.

So yeah, I'm gonna go. <3

Learned Counter Canter!

2008-09-26T19:16:00.003-06:00

So Tuesday was my first ever lesson with Decia - a private to boot!

It was INTENSE. We worked on my equitation (not leaning, sitting up, shoulders back, HAND UP!!!), and we got Ringo ROOOUND. We did a circle for a while, and established the pace I should have in all gaits. When she moved the poles we had been circling over, Ringo STOPPED. Before an X. He was like WTF FOR THE LAST 500 TIMES THAT WASN'T THERE I SWEAR. It was weird. We did an interesting course. It was fun! Ringo was sweating a lot - for once! He cooled off fast as usual though.

Wednesday I was SWAMPED with homework, so didn't ride =(.

Thursday I had a private. Ringo and I learned counter-canter. It was AWESOME. I can't believe he learned it in one lesson. He tried so hard - his attitude is changing SO drastically - instead of coming in to fight or go whatever, or something..he's like 'you're an idiot but i'll try it your way'. It's good.

I'm super excited for the show!!! Like, ahhh! in less then a week!!! AHHHHH!!

Tonight I went on a trail ride. We encountered cows. The first five to about thirty, ringo held his ground. He watched, but he was calm...even though they were mooing SO FREAKING LOUD!

Then they STAMPEDED towards the fence. Yeah. Well Ringo was DONE. He tried to bolt, jigged, preformed several high level dressage moves such as the piafe, passage, half pass in the canter (both ways too!), and some HIGH stepping...Oh and BUCKING! And spinning. And some more bolting.

The cows followed us along the fenceline - that was the main problem. Of course ringo is zigzaging EVERYWHERE and a CAR came up. Yeah........ The car waited. Thankfully. They got quite a show. He waved at me and smiled sheepishly. I managed to wave back. Then I turned around and made Ringo walk up to the cows, then slightly past them. Then I turned him home, and we cantered around the ring to burn off energy. He did the counter canter again!

That was our day today.

My friends (almost all of them) are acting weird.

Krista is fine on the phone, but sometimes at school she treats me (and Jess, and sometimes Emma) like...crap. She snubs us, or whatever. It's really strange. I don't know what's going on. I know she's lying about something, or hiding something.

The whole Tim thing...well we haven't been getting along 100% lately. And of course all the guys follow his lead (for the most part). I feel like an outsider on our group sometimes. Like, actually. And it sucks.

But whatever.

Oh yeah, and the whole unrequited love thing. What did I get myself into?

Party and....

2008-09-21T01:00:00.002-06:00

I hate that I'm jealous.

Not of her or him specifically, though they are two of my most precious friends. Well actually, she's my BEST friend. He's my closest or second closest guy friend. It just feels like I'm not a PART of the group sometimes. And she's never been interested in anyone, and she's known of him for a while. He's so freaking hard to read, I'm one of the VERY few people that have gotten him to open up. I'm the only girl who has.

I like that they like each other - I think it's cute. Will anything happen? Not sure. I honestly can't tell. It's entirely to chance on that one. They both HATE feelings.

What bothers me is that I don't have that. No, that I don't have HIM (not this guy him, another him). Because I HAD that, something so special, someone I could talk to WHENever, about ANYTHING. He comforted me, he understood horses, music, everything. And we did have something special. And I'm still not freaking OVER IT YET. I've moved on, to an extent. I am not wallowing in grief or anything. But I miss him. So damn much.

I HATE that I do. I shouldn't. I DON'T in some way. Yet anytime his name pops up on msn, I get so HYPER. So excited. I hate hate hate it.

And I'm afraid, because I shouldn't feel like this.

And I'm afraid, because I don't want THEM to hurt each other, or themselves. And I don't want to be on the outside. I hate it.

I can't say anything. Because she does. For the first time ever.

I want my horse, but it's too late to go see him. I miss him. I miss HIM.

I hate that I'm sitting here trying not to be depressed, not to cry, when I should be happy for them. For him for moving on. And in a way, I AM.

And then there's Sam and Duncan. He's a freaking loser now. It's incredible. I thought he was good for her...she's bad for him.

Dean is funny drunk. So is Justin.

Thank god I don't drink.

Right now I'm almost wishing I had let Dean hit on me. And I hate that I'm thinking that because he would regret it so much. I'd be nothing, and I don't even like him.

But I hate being alone. I spent a long long portion of my life being alone. And I relied on my imagination. And I HATE that I still rely on it now. It makes me ashamed - not to be single, or necessarily that I miss HIM, but that I have to rely on my only-child methods to see me through stuff. To pretend I'm loved in that way. I know I'm loved- I have awesome friends.

But now that I've TRULY felt it (the longing was always there, as it is in most girls), I want it back. Not just anybody. HIM.

And then one couple I thought, truly BELIEVED were going to be soulmates or whatever, broke up. Like. Wow.

I just don't understand. There's no one to change my focus to, really. All my other even potentials (high standards) don't measure up or just don't work or are just...no.

And stalker guy is not an option. I'd seriously shoot myself before that.

I hate that I'm so freaking selfish.

I hate that you're not here to talk to me, even just about Duncan. You always make it better.

I hate that you think I'm an immature loudmouth.

Sometimes those insults really hurt (of course you never give them to me).

Can I cry now?

Lines

2008-09-16T00:18:00.002-06:00

So today, I take Ringo for a trail ride because it was GORGEOUS out. It felt like summer. Our Indian Summer I guess.

Anyways, I went down the road to where there is actual pavement, with road lines.

Well. Ringo acted like the lines were an invisible barrier - a wall or something. He would NOT step over them. It took a good few minutes to convince him. First over the white, then over the double yellow...he treated them like poles it was hilarious. He also did an excellent leg yield in front of them haha. Then I got him to step on the word STOP and the EXTRA thick line. ha.

The ride there was uneventful. The little stallion was in the paddock still but didn't really notice us and Ringo and I trotted right by. We galloped, it was tons of fun. I made sure to do equal leads, and made sure he picked up the one I ASKED him to.

On the way back he was good. There was anxious moments walking by the stallion but Ringo was AWESOME. He was also very sweaty haha.

We got back and I hosed him off. He enjoyed eating grass with his bath lol.

This past weekend I was yucky sick - fever, HEADACHE, sore throat, cough, runny eyes, runny nose, sneezing, dizzyness, sickness, it was awful. I tried to go to my riding lesson and work (I left 20 minutes after I was supposed to because I fell asleep again...) and was lateish, but thankfully had help tacking up.

I ended up having to get off because I was just too sick. I hadn't ridden friday because I was sick and Ringo, instead of being crazyinsane (he was left inside that morning too!) was so good. He just plodded along, being so sympathetic. I love him.

I was sent home after that and spent the whole day sleeping. Sunday I had to skip the barn as well. I just felt AWFUL.

That's why I went out tonight.

This past weekend was one of the FEW times in my life I've skipped the barn for sickness. I usually go anyways, mainly because horses make me feel better, and it's only for a few hours. I know some people don't go if they don't feel good, some force through it. I was wondering if anyone had any experiences on that? I know it's probably better to wait it out at home but...I'm sure there are some funny stories too haha.

Last week was bad. Homework on top of homework, me being cranky, a guy friend of mine being an idiot (well they always are but actually jerkish, and this is one who rarely is), and the Trapper....

Trapper ended up being okay THANK GOD. I thought he was going to die. I was positive of it, and I think Jess was too. They figure he had a stroke, but he's back to normal (100% "his" normal anyways haha) now. Thank goodness. I am SO relieved. I LOVE that dog. And of course Jess and her family love him way more and have had him his WHOLE life - and his dad.

This week has started off better. I was in a really good mood this morning for some reason, Trapper is better, school was good today, as was Jazz band.

I'm having some scheduling conflicts in my horse show...and if it wasn't THIS horse show I wouldn't go. I have to miss THREE days of school. Ugh. Ugh Ugh Ugh. And then our hotel where EVERYONE else is staying at is booked. -sighs-

I'm supposed to be marching in the parade this weekend but I don't want to do it - mainly because I don't know how I'm going to get there, I'll have to miss work, riding, it'll be COLD... I might get out of it but...

I actually am okay with marching. I even enjoy it, and I LOVE playing my instrument. It's just it's GOING to be cold, and I suck at memorizing songs...well I don't but I don;t have TIME!

Well that's about it. I'm tired but I don't want to sleep. -sigh-

2008-09-06T19:56:00.003-06:00

So I had a lesson today, and it went well. We did without stirrup work...yay lol. We also talked a lot about medals/equitation, as I'm going to the ASJA finals for them!! I'm super excited. It was easy to qualify but I think I might actually have a chance at something.

My trainer told me that me and my horse are 'Dingo' and 'Sam at home, but when we're at a show we become 'Ringo Starr' and 'Samantha'. She said watching me ride in the last ride off really impressed her and that my class as a rider went way up - not that it was low before. She said the next three weeks would be torture, but it would be worth it. I'd also get all my winter's work done now.

I have three weeks to perfect my position and teach Ringo the counter-canter.

I can't wait!

The Last Day

2008-08-31T21:25:00.002-06:00

It was COLD, rainy, and WET.

Jen, Jess and I didn't show. It was just too miserable.

I like the rain, but I was also warm because of all the layers I had on haha. Jess and I also steamed up her car and marinated in it for an hour. Then our barn owner and her son brought us hot chocolate!!

Allison won champion!! I was happy for her. I thought she was nuts to even go in the undersaddle today.

The sand ring was SOUP. Like, not even kidding. You couldn't ride in it. The Grand Prix ring was holding up nicely, the other jumper ring was okay, not the best though. The hunter ring ends were slop... yuck.

So we loaded up around noon, Ringo walked RIGHT in. He had been cold when I got there, around 7AM so I put another blanket on him. That was one of the main reasons I didn't show - he was cold, and riding would have been FREEZING.

Polar sure can neigh loudly. It's freaking ear-splitting and annoying. He has no separation anxiety whatsoever....

We got back and I loaded EVERYTHING from my locker and trailer into my truck (it fit...!!!)

I got home, unloaded, organized, and cleannnnnned. Yay. My tack and boots are all spic and span. I spilt oil. Lol.

I'm missing two ribbons, a 4th and my MEDAL 2nd!!!! AHHH!

So my final count was:
[o] firsts
[3] seconds
[1] third
[2] fourths
[2] fifths
[3] sixths
[o] sevenths
[o] eighths

Children's Medal, A Eq on the flat, 2'9" jumper, 2'9" Jumper Classic, 3'0 Children's Hunter, 3'0 Children's Hunter, 3'0 Children's Hunter, Child Eq on the flat, 2'9" jumper, 2'9" jumper.

I also won $100.50 dollars, lol.

So anyways, I just had a fight with my parents.

I applied at a horse store because my mom especially was pressuring me to get a job. We had a few discussions about it.

I mention it, and she's all like, "I'm so surprised you applied..."

Well I said I thought she had told me I HAD to get a part time job (she had). Well she freaks out and says no she didn't, I say yes she did, and quote the conversation back to her (I remembered it because I was pissed off that they spent my whole life saying no working during school and now I had to...) and she said she had said that at the BEGINNING OF THE SUMMER.

I was like, uh no. And my dad goes you heard her wrong I'm sure you don't have to work but if you want to fine.

My mom kept chiming in things and I just worked on not being a brat and keeping quiet.

Then as I go to go downstairs, the 'issue' resolved (apparently....I have no idea what to do), my mom tells me to pick the stuff up at the top of the stairs, which I was going to. And most of it I put there to be washed... So I said I was going to, and she jumped all over me. Stalking over to the door when I said I wasn't showing attitude, and said sorry and she basically said she was three seconds away from grounding me and slammed the freaking door in my face.

Yeah SHE slammed the door in MY face.

And I'm the immature selfish one?

At least I wasn't sworn at. It hasn't been that bad in a while, but come on! I'm NEVER good enough. I'm too this, too that, too irresponsible (I lost my helmet case forever ago and now it's an 'issue).

Of course being a straight A, honor roll student, successful (ish?) rider, good band student, clean, non-alcoholic teenager is horrible.

UGH.

And school starts in one day. I'm not ready. I'm scared, intimidated, and AHHHHHHH.

Day 5

2008-08-30T20:28:00.003-06:00

Gorgeous sunrise this morning (they have been the last week, like OMG beautiful gorgeous). Traffic was REALLY light since it was Saturday morning, haha.

Before long cloud rolled over and it was kinda cool, but then it cleared right out and was quite nice.

Ringo was good for braiding and corking. I corked Polar too, he was an angel haha.

When I was ready to go I got on at the stalls and rode down to the rings. Ringo was kinda jittery so I was happy - it meant (so I thought) he'd have energy and such. He spooked at a little kid opening the porta-potty door. I was like haha you idiot.

He was really looking and jumpy in the warm up ring but he settled REALLY fast. We started jumping and he was kinda there, but not really.

We almost landed on a freaking oxer, but that was my fault - bad turn, not really straight.

Our flat class sucked. It was eq on the flat, and we got 6th...out of 6. He wasn't listening to my leg at ALL though, and my reins were too long I think. My trainer didn't comment on anything on my ride so I don't really even know what I did wrong. Only what my friend did and didn't do......

Our hunter class was pretty bad. I didn't have enough pace and he wasn't listening to my leg at ALL. He was behind my leg, jumping okay, but just YUCK.

I was pretty upset at myself because I KNOW we can do better then that. We did yesterday!

But I got 5th out of 7 (I can't believe someone did worse...yuck =( ) so whatever.

I just wanted a nice positive round. Screw the ribbons.

So that's my goal for tomorrow. Positive, flowing, solid round, like my medal round.

Tomorrow it's supposed to rain, and be cold... lol. That's okay. I'm hoping Ringo will be good because:
-either he likes water
-he just wants to get done
-he's more reliant on me because of the weather
-i beg him

LOL.

We're giving him bute tonight because he might be a bit sore. He was just TIRED today. He must not have slept well =( my poor baby. <3

Days Three And Four

2008-08-29T19:53:00.002-06:00

So I spent day 2 (Wednesday) night talking on msn (for almost SIX HOURS) with uh, a friend. And ex, really.

We talked a lot. About what was going on in our lives, religion, school, music, and mostly his girl issues.

We've stayed in touch and are really good friends. He is a great guy.

I am over him.

Well now I definitely am. I think.

It was hard though, being the 'confidant' although I'm glad I was trusted enough. Our conversations are quite frequently like that - deep, serious, but with an edge of teasing. Like for instance, I only talk to him because he's 'sexy', lmao.

But anyways, it was tough, but also 'healing' in a way. And I think I helped??

But I ended up staying up ALL night. I am SO surprised I didn't fall asleep driving there or back.

But anyways, Ringo was pretty good. He was a bit sluggish and slow that day, but over all good. We got 5th and 6th in the jumper classes. I rode terribly. My position was everywhere, ringo was pretty bleh. But we ended up placing pretty well. Then we got 4th in our Child Eq over fences, which was out of 5 LOL. We were a bit slow though, and he chipped a few times and I again wasn't riding well. I got 2nd in the A Eq on the flat.....OUT OF TWO! haha. It was all good though.

Today Ringo was AWESOME. He was just ON IT. I don't know why. He was just....amazing. I was riding really well too.

We got 3rd in the jumper classic - beaten by two ponies haha. It was a jump off round...he was SO good.

We got 4th in our Hunter class, WITH swapped leads before two right to left fences...so if we hadn't done that, it woulda been a first!! AH!

And in our medal round he was AWESOME. We were fourth so we got called back for the RIDE OFF!!! We had to walk in, go directly to a trot to jump a fence, bending line to a huge oxer, halt, canter to the combination, sitting trot out.

Ringo was AMAZING. He halted well, he stepped once but we had the best halt out of everyone. He was AWESOME. We went from fourth to second.

So yeah, a SECOND in our medal. It was my first REAL ride off. It was soooo cool! And Larissa couldn't help me at all. She was SOOOOO happy for me. Like, really really happy. Lol.

That was today. Jess won champion in 2'6" jumpers!!

Our barn has a LOT of ribbons.

I'm so happy. I've placed in every class.

But more importantly, Ringo and I are working TOGETHER. And he's not being a nutcase. That's the best thing.

Jen's been braiding for me, just because it's stressful and I clean his stall and do other things while she does that.

She and Polar have been doing okay. They have a new bit, and Jen isn't used to that much control, lol. They are getting better with every day though!

Oh, I forgot to add, when I came back yesterday, I feel asleep right before five, and slept until twenty after five this morning...

OVER TWELVE FREAKING HOURS of sleep! I've NEVER slept that long. EVER.

It was amazing.

My parents could NOT wake me up, either. I didn't even eat dinner, haha.

Day Two

2008-08-27T21:56:00.002-06:00

Today went really well. I was there super early because I thought I had hunters today, but I didn't, so I cleaned Ringo's stall, unwrapped, cleaned, and all that stuff.

He cut his nose (while I was in the freaking stall) on a ROUNDED edge. Yeah. It's pathetic. I'll try to get a picture of it tomorrow.

Our warm up was great - until his explosion on the right lead, going towards our third practice jump. He just grabbed the bit and BUCKED. I lost a stirrup and came SO close to going over but I was NOT about to fall off, lose confidence, etc. So I grabbed his head yanked it around, he stopped for one stride then started again, and I kicked him forward. He was fine after that.

Our 2 jumper rounds were AWESOME. He was on the ball. He turned when I asked, jumped great...I was really happy.

We got a 6th in the Jump - Off round, and 2nd in the speed class!! I was so happy!! We were in first until the second last competitor....lol. It was my first time placing in jumper though, and I was SO happy.

I let Ringo eat a lot of grass. His bit was gross but oh well.

I took him for a few walks and stuff. He was pretty happy today.

Tomorrow I have hunters and jumpers. Yay! lol

First Day

2008-08-26T16:49:00.003-06:00

We brought Ringo down last night to the show grounds. He was fine. He loaded okay. Not the best but still not too bad. He settled in fine as well. I forgot his rain sheet and a few other things so drove all the way back up to the barn and then home that night. I was not happy with myself, lol.

Well morning brought cold, RAIN, and wind. It was gross, but I didn't really mind it. It was refreshing, and our barn was 1/3 or 4 barns that were there. Schooling was cancelled because the footing was so bad.

We schooled in the indoor arena (it has that European imported footing, I believe they used it at the Olympics as well...) which was nice. While we were waiting to go into the arena (they were watering it), Ringo was a nutcase - pawing, dancing, being an all round idiot. He wouldn't stand still as I took his rain sheet off and tried to get him ready so I could mount. My trainer had to hold him.

He settled in really nicely though, and he was really good, especially since I hadn't jumped him in ...a while. Two weeks ish, if not more.

I was happy.

I apparently don't wrap tight enough, ugh. I had INGRAINED in my head that wrapping tight is BAD. But I wrap too loose, so I practiced wrapping correctly. I hate not being good at things, especially when I'm supposed to be more experienced.

Ringo and I went for a walk, I cleaned out his cork holes again to make it easier for tomorrow, I wrapped, I wiped my tack down, and cleaned Ringo's stall.

My horse likes grapes. Lol.

More tomorrow.

Friendship Ended

2008-08-21T22:32:00.002-06:00

I just ended a friendship with a riding friend that I've known for almost 8 years.

I was just sick of it. The treatment, my apologies (sincere ones) were not enough. So I am done.

And I feel like a horrible, awful person. But I know I'm right.

I never meant to hurt them, honest.

I tried my best, to keep it going, to be the best person I could be, to be the best FRIEND I could be.

But we're too different. I don't like what they've become, and what they are becoming.

It was time. I'm actually surprised it hasn't come sooner.

I hate how this has to happen at NIGHT. And tomorrow...I can't even see my horse! Band camp concert!

So even driving isn't full freedom.

God.

I'm just so mixed up. About the losing a friend thing, about another 'friend' thing... It's all just stupid. I want my horse. And I can't even GO there.

I have better friends, I know that. But this person meant so much to me for so long.

And then some of my true friends comforted me. Wow. I love them. I am so lucky.

2008-08-20T22:17:00.002-06:00

Band camp has been going well. I'm in the second most advanced barn. It's nice being kinda on top.

All my friends are in my band too, so it's pretty sweet. I'm also driving three of them, which is cool too. It's been pretty good, the traffic was really bad tonight, and on the first morning but it's been fairly good otherwise.

I love Band Camp. Seriously. It's musicmusicmusic and I learn a lot. And you get to play FUN pieces and really challenge yourself with them.

Ringo's doing well. I took him for a trail ride last night, and he was really good. It was a very 'exciting' trail ride - we galloped, stepped on a paper bag and jumped STRAIGHT into the air, and had a HUGE freak out about a miniature pony (stallion). Ringo was like OMFG WHAT IS THAT?! ...And bolted, AWAY from home, amazingly enough. HE pranced, his chin was to his chest, he balked, backed, spun.... It was interesting. He got past it though. Thankfully.

Of course he did this all in the middle of the road... -sigh-

My horse is weird. He's rarely spookish at anything. Occasionally something surprising will pop out but he doesn't do much - maybe a jump or kick out.

He's most nervous around other animals - he stopped and stared at goats for a long time, used to try to bolt away from cows (he's loads better now), and he is careful around dogs (understandably, we've had a few run snarling and jumping at us before).

Spooking doesn't really bother me - my old horse did it A LOT. And SO FAR (-knockonwood-) I've managed to stay on the spooks.

Show is next week.

Molly is doing better, still confined to the stall but definitely healing. It's definitely a NASTY wound. Yuck. Barbed wire fences.... -sigh-

A New Day

2008-08-17T21:48:00.003-06:00

So we didn't end up going to the show. Ringo's leg was still swollen, and I hadn't ridden him. I didn't feel comfortable showing, and it would've just gotten worse standing in a stall all day.

I'm not too disappointed to be honest. It's been crazy enough.

Ringo is better now, we've been riding, and we've gone on a few group trail rides. They've been really nice. Mostly walking. Ringo behaved! Yay!

And I have my license now!! YAY! I can go to the barn WHENEVER. That is such a comfort.

Tomorrow is band camp, and I'm driving 3 other people besides myself. It'll be fun, hopefully. I want to be first, and I want someone in my band that's my friend.

And the 'friend' I don't like isn't coming!!!!!! YES! I thought he was, but he isn't! Thank goodness!

Anyways, Molly got hurt. She got caught in the fence we believe. She's on stall rest. Her poor leg. She's a wonderful patient though. And such a sweetheart.

There's not really much else, so that's all for now...

A Nice Welcome Home

2008-08-06T00:30:00.003-06:00

Whenever I go away, I miss my horse the most. He's my lifeline, my happy spot, my routine even.

When I come back, I get a varied responses from him - once I got the cold shoulder, once I got a few bucks and hops and then perfection, i've gotten a nicker, a happy horse, a gallop to my side, a running away, or a combination.

I went to Montana this weekend with a friend, no horse exposure though. We went off-roading (my first time!) and it was loads of fun. Yet I couldn't help but think it would be 30x better on the back of a horse and a camera around my neck.
We went kayaking, swimming, hiking, saw deer, caught turtles, caught a snake, squished bugs, read books, chased away range cows, saw a moose, talked, had campfires, stared up at the sky...It was really fun.

When I went to the barn today (after a three and a half hour coffee (read talk) with the ex........something that shocked me - I knew we'd stay friends, but that really surprised me that he asked me to go for coffee - anyways) Ringo perked right up and started over for me.

I could FEEL his happiness - and mine - to see eachother. He tried to follow me into the tack room, he kept his attention almost completely riveted to me, and watched me. It was nice. I missed him a LOT, even though I was only gone for 4 days.

Our ride was really really good. He felt AWESOME. He was eager to work, eager to please, and being back in the saddle was awesome. He was so so good.

He was a prick when I went to bathe him - OMG GREEN GRASS. Like you don't have two acres of it in your pasture....

So we had some backing up and such to do, until he was willing to stand and listen to me when I pulled his head up. Then he was good.

A girl (who isn't, uh, really into horses. Or it doesn't seem like it. She barely rides.) brought her friend out (a person I know and is my 'minion' - inside clarinet section joke (yes I'm a band geek.)), who apparently rode - wants to be a big Rodeo Princess when she's 18 I believe - western. So its all good, the owner of the horse rides the horse first. She barely does anything with him. Gets on trots a length. Stops at the gate. Walks over to her friend. Talks. Trots another length. Walks. Goes over to the gate, and talks to friend again. Canters a few times around. Gets off, leads horse inside.

Another border, whom I quite like, comes out with her horse. Says girl's friend fell off - onto her face. She apparently jumped on, cantered away, tried to gallop (in the indoor arena fyi) horse either got rambunctious or shifted or something, she fell off.

Thankfully she was okay. Not sure if anyone got back on the horse or not.

Thing is, our barn is private, mostly. There's just a few boarders. When you bring friends, you're supposed to have them sign a waiver - AND use your good judgement.

If they can't ride - don't let them, or only go as far as they can take. USE YOUR COMMON SENSE.

I've let my friends ride my horse. A few:
My best friend (totally non-horsey) rode him at the walk. That was enough. Ringo can be a crazy horse, but I trust him. He takes care of people on his back. And we just walked. He did well (totally listened to me and didn't break a deadhead walk).

My ex rode him, he knows horses at least a bit (his family has 3 currently), he knows how to sit and all that, though he rides western when he does ride. He and Ringo walked, did a bit of a trot. Ringo kept his deadhead walk up, listened fine, kept an ear on me, it was fine.

I invited two other guy friends to ride him, they declined. I didn't push it. One of my friends wanted to, and she had been around horses, but she chickened out. I didn't push it. She was scared, fine. She wasn't into horses anymore, the only reason she came was because I was staying at her house.

In ALL the above instance I rode my horse first. I occasionally jumped on after.

Two of my riding friends rode him.
One he was pretty good for. Did what he was told, walk/trot/canter. She worked him, and he did well. I didn't even get on him beforehand. She's a good rider. I hopped on after, did a bit more with him.

Another one of my friends rode him twice. First time w/t/c, pretty soon after I got him (in the first year, anyways) he was good. Then she rode him a second time and Ringo didn't like her - at ALL. I had to get on because he was kicking up a fuss, she was complaining (or at least to my memory). He was fine with me.

A friend of mine at the barn has ridden him, and rides him for me whenever I'm away. She rides him fine, he does very well apparently. She loves riding him.

Another friend has ridden him once or twice (she's from my barn) and has liked him. She did all the basic stuff too, he was pretty good.

Another more 'green' barn friend hopped on him - only walked because she was a bit nervous and he was much larger then her 14hh mare. I rode him first, and after. He was totally fine.

It's finding the line between what the horse is like (ex. deadhead, calm, fiery, bucks a lot, bolts, etc.) and what the rider can handle (ex. never ridden, thinks they are the best, experienced, etc.) and letting your person go from there. Generally most of the people riding your horse (particularly the non-horse and the friends) will listen to what you say. Make it clear what they can and can not to - if not from the get go then for sure tell them when they are on. You don't have to criticize, but if they've never ridden, tell them the correct position.

If a rider doesn't listen, get them off your horse.

I only have people I truly care about at the barn. It's a special place for me. A haven, so to speak. If I invite someone it means I think damn highly of you and want to share something that means a lot to me.

I've invited (non-barn friends, I mean) 7 people. 3 guys, 4 girls. Only two have come back. And those same two came to a horse show (one of them brought family, lol).

I just think that you have to be careful. I don't want my friends getting hurt, I don't want anyone to get sued, and I sure as hell don't want my horse hurt either.

So welcome homes and letting your friends ride responsibly was the theme of this post. I got off to a bit of a rant, but oh well.

Jurassic Classic And Working

2008-07-26T00:48:00.003-06:00

I went with my friend to her horse show.

It was cool. REALLY badly laid out though - they rented a facility, and while the rings and stuff were nice enough, the layout was just...ugh. The office, food, stalls, and jumper ring were all together. Then over a BIG hill (they did have a path but the hill was kinda steep and it was like a 5 minute walk) or around the hill on a road (but you couldn't cross cause of a texas gate, so that was a cars only route) you got to the *Indoor* hunter ring. Which was a bit small but okay.

My friend did really well, as did her little sister. And they got the coolest ribbons - all the colors were crazy and neon-ified. Their horses were good, one is really green (first year of showing) but he did really well. He did have a rail, and they had a bit off a rambunctious (being a goof about lead changes) start, but they ended up with a champion in the novice (2'6") horse, with two firsts and a 2nd and an 8th I believe. And a third and a second were won in other classes.

She scratched her last division because Fuzzy was being really, really good, and he was getting tired.

Her little sister was on the CUTEST little pony ever. Seriously. And Nicole (the pony) was the older girl's old pony's dam. Haha, it was sweet. They won FIVE firsts (including beating the older sister in an eq on the flat!) and a fifth.

There were a few REALLY nice horses, including a 3 or 4 year old welsh x thoroughbred stallion. He was CUTE. He won the undersaddle, even though he reared and freaked out once. His rider was AMAZING. I loved watching her ride. And I loved that pony.

Most of the horses to me were more the school horse type - at least some of the ones I saw. I thought there were a few cute ones though. There was a lot of refusals and eliminations in the hunter ring. I didn't get to watch too much (as in three rounds...) of the jumper ring because of the distance. So not a lot of photos.

I then went to my barn, where I rode Ringo and Polar.

Ringo was totally not wanting to go forward, even at the walk, and didn't even want to trot. Something felt 'off' when he did trot, and it wasn't his front legs, and his head wasn't bobbing. So I got off and tried to figure it out. It's definitely in the hind legs, but there was no heat or tenderness, so I wonder if he got kicked or just pulled something. I hope he's better tomorrow.

Polar was....an idiot. He was okay at the walk and trot - then he started trying to canter, and I made him trot. Had a big long fight about that, then I did ask him to canter, and he was good for two strides, then he grabbed the bit and ran. So back to trot, transition, transition. Now he starts bolting and speed trotting. Got him back again, canter and he explodes again. So we work on it, then I just try to let him canter. Well on the left rein he finally -got- it, and wasn't *too* crazy. On the right he totally ignored my right leg and started cantering SIDEWAYS.

Then he decided to spin on his haunches and bolt and lunge and funness! That was fun. He didn't get me loose or anything.

I think next time I need to relax, and be more half-halt then pull. And ride him first, especially if Ringo's off, cause then he won't feel so FAST.

So yesterday I went down to my trainers barn with my friend to work for the day. We rode a bunch of horses, groomed a few, cleaned tack, swept, were the jump crew...

I rode Aurora, a cute older horse. She was really smooth and I really liked her. She's a 'push button' - point and she'll generally go. Once you got her going (and it wasn't too hard) she was an excellent mover. I really liked her. Her rider is a little girl I think, and I can totally see that. Rory is SUCH a sweetheart. Very willing.

I rode a horse named Speedo, who is one of my trainer's horses. I LOVED him. He was quick - well more like B-I-G. He was a bit fast in the canter, but NOTHING like Polar, haha. I really enjoyed riding him. He had big gaits, big movement, and I just loved him.

I rode a pony, Charlotte, who felt like a horse. She had such nice gaits, and was so responsive. She was tons of fun to ride. I really enjoyed it. She's a cute pinto (black and white) pony, and although I didn't jump her she has tons of scope and power (seen her jump). I loved riding her.

The other pony I rode was Carmel. Or 'Smelly Carmelly' as Larissa calls her, lol. I didn't particularly enjoy riding her - for one, she was quite short. And I am not the height for ponies haha. And her gaits were really short and choppy. And she had major attitude. I liked her canter the best, but I was fine with getting off of her lol.

I got to ride my trainer's assitant/parter trainer's bazillion dollar hunter. OH MY GOD. The movement...the amazingness. I loved it. He was AMAZING. And his name was Nigel, which is just sweet. He was gorgeous, and although I just warmed him up for my trainer, he was so so so incredible to ride.

So that's my last few days. It was tons of fun.

Afraid of Goats...

2008-07-23T03:04:00.004-06:00

So yesterday Jess and I went to the barn as usual, and we decided to go on a trail ride. At first the horses were kinda like, meh, but they pepped up pretty quickly. Ringo was striding out in a trot very nicely, so we quickly moved up the pace. He galloped, the fastest he's EVER gone. It was so much fun! He hit that FLAT OUT pace that was exhilarating, but I only let him do it a few strides because of the ground. Silky was just cantering along, behind me. Or at least that's the way it felt.

We went farther west then I've ever gone before, and decided to try to go all the way around. They were so good - the road was kinda busy, and they didn't blink at the traffic.

Ringo did however have to ignore absolutely everything except the cows and goats! Oh my! You'd think he'd be used to them by now. But no. My horse has a fascination/FEAR of goats, cows, and birds that fly up at him. And dogs. I can understand the last two, but come on.

But anyways, he wasn't listening and was being an idiot. He wasn't being BAD - he just HAD to look and I was trying to get him to move, and STOP looking. He did, reluctantly, but it annoyed me.

Well we turned into one of these mini-community/acreage's, hoping we would find an exit, mainly because Ringo was acting stupid. Well it turns out, it was just a HUUUUGE loop. Haha, oops. It had lots of dogs on it too. That thank heaven were ALL fenced in, because other wise my horse would have blown a gasket.

He spooked at the dogs and tried to bolt/buck. I don't blame him for that, and he only did spook twice, though he 'looked' everytime we heard a dog, and started acting all spooky.

Yet he walked right up to a gate with a huge dog growling and leaping and barking, and then a little dog yapping away so this lady could admire him. I swear we made her day. It was nice.

So we ended up finding a shortcut through a field that wasn't fenced off and led us to the road we had been on before (before the busier road). I got kinda turned around, but we figured it out.

We started trotting home, and then Ringo EXPLODED. He BURST into a gallop and went flat out. Like, Jess said later he shrunk down...He was FLYING. And I couldn't stop him.

I couldn't turn him because there was a ditch on either side of the road, and we were on the grassy shoulder, and I was yanking but he was slowing really. I was scared - he was going too fast to do much thinking. My only fear was getting him stopped before he broke a leg - the ground wasn't that even, and he was bobbing up and down little knolls.

So I zig zagged, while pulling. He finally slowed, only to explode into a bit of a bucking fit. He wanted to GO. And I was like NO!

He spun, half reared, bucked, and just acted like an idiot. When I finally got him STOPPED, I turned him the opposite direction and made him stand. At my shouts, Jess stopped Silky, but Silky was getting impatient so Jess started on.

So Ringo and I walked back, we caught up to Jess and Silky. He was REALLY good the rest of the time. Didn't even look at the cows, didn't try to bolt, didn't speed up. He was being good - maybe he took my words to heart (I said he was walking home no matter what and if he tried to bolt I'd bring him back and make him walk it backwards).

It was kinda frustrating when Jess got bored and started doing turn on the haunches, then cantering up to Ringo and slightly passing him. He's an OTTB, and he loves to race - that's half the reason he RAN. I didn't say anything because I figured he had to learn to behave, and too his credit, he only jigged once and settled down immediately.

The mosquito's randomly got so bad Jess trotted/cantered home. I trotted part of the way, and again, Ringo was an angel.

So all in all, it was interesting.

I was also a worry wort on the trail ride - I was afraid such a long trail ride randomly would make him tie up or dehydrate lol. I was being silly but it didn't help I didn't know exactly where we were (I had a general idea), my horse was being good but randomly freaking out because of dogs/goats/cows.

Oh well. It was an experience. He won't be looking forward to a trail ride for a while now I think, haha.

My lesson was good. It was 'turtle' exercises. Ringo was really good.

We actually qualified for the medal finals in the ASJA!!!!! I was so happy!

And we planned out our next show. I'm doing the medal, A eq, and children's hunters.

That's alll....

Waiting For That Sign

2008-07-22T12:04:00.002-06:00

Happy Birthday to me!!! I'm 16, finally. I can drive in less then 20 days. Hopefully. If all goes well. That means barn time WHENEVER. Yes!

My birthday was pretty low key. Myself and two friends and my mom went out for dinner. Then they came back to my house after we stopped to see a few more friends. We watched our school play on DVD, then one of them went home. The other girl was at my house for the weekend cause her parents were away.

It was nice, we had fun with buying stuff off iTunes, but it was a pretty emotional weekend. We both found out some stuff (more her then me). We walked an hour and a half to a friends house. My mom freaked out because it was 11 when I called her. But it was good, I got to see my best friend, and I hadn't seen her in a month.

We also went back for dinner the next night, haha.

But, I was so sure about letting go - well I knew I would have setbacks, but I was finally 100% for sure going to do it...And I get these texts. Which is GOOD because I was concerned he didn't want to be friends, but I guess he did. He basically said hey, what's up, then I didn't reply (cell locked in truck at work), he texted again. Which means he had to be thinking about it. About me. Which makes me happy. And wondering if that's a sign, because I discovered the texts RIGHT after I told my friends about my whole, "I'm Done" kick.

But anyways, Ringo's had an easy week. Just a few trail rides, one light work in the ring, two bareback sessions...Nothing major. He's been really good lately.

Sierra (a buckskin QH mare at our barn) colicked on Saturday night, which was scary. Displaced colon I believe (they think it's from all the rolling she was doing?). Thankfully she's okay, just on stall rest and limited feed for a short while. Poor baby.

So that's about it.

The Show

2008-07-15T12:47:00.003-06:00

The Show:

DAY 1: Getting There
Jess and I piled our stuff in the car and trailer, super-cleaned our tack, the whole she-bang. I didn't have too much to do as I had done it the day before. There was a huge storm where it poured. I was waiting for the horses to bolt back up to the barn, but they didn't. Too bad.

Ringo freaked out when we were loading - when the other horses were in he started bucking and trying to bolt. He loaded okay, it took a few tries and a few minutes. And he was having issues backing up into the stall.

We got to the show grounds and went to get shavings. Well guess what? No shavings would be delivered until 10AM tomorrow. We were so annoyed. We couldn't even get any. Thank god our BO had pelleted bedding and a few bags of shaving in the truck & trailer. We had to split it between three horses, but it was better then nothing.

We set up our tack room (we had to share with 2 other people because there wasn't enough stabling) and we took up HALF the tack room (on the side with the door!) with all our tack, boxes, and feed.

After that we said goodnight, fed the horses, and went home.

DAY 2: Schooling
Got there really early in the morning, fed our horses, met one of our trainers students from her barn. She was really nice.
I took Ringo out for a few walks, and he was alright.

He was so good - he was antsy but no bolting or bucking. I was really happy with him. My hunter schooling was alright, nothing special, he wasn't really listening to my leg. I only had one schooling ticket, so I only went around once. I did the 3'0 height.

In the jumper ring I did the 2'9" and the 3'0" schooling, mostly because we weren't sure how he would be. I rode it more like a hunter round because he was still a bit hyper. He was really good! We got two clear round ribbons.

After that we went home, it was about 4 or 5.

DAY 3: First Day of Showing
I only had one 3'0" jumper class, and it ended up being later in the day. So by the time my class rolled around, I had walked Ringo down and was watching some rounds before I warmed up. All of a sudden he just EXPLODED, bucking, trying to bolt, prancing. I got him calmed down kinda, and he exploded again. So up I went to the warm up ring.

He was the worst he's EVER been. He was spooking (which is a joke, he didn't spook at anything else before or after, and he isn't a spooky horse), bolting, BUCKING, crow hopping. Everything. I got him going okay, and we started jumping. Then out of the blue, he explodes again. I was so frustrated, and to be honest, scared. It's been a while since I've been scared about his bucking. I was sitting them through fine, it was just in the ring I was afraid he would go NUTS. As in so nuts I couldn't control him. I didn't want him hurting himself, or me, or someone else.

So I got to lunge him, and I might go in the 3'3"s (the jumps were REALLY small, and I school higher at home). Well Ringo is not good at lunging, it's something we've been kind of working on, except I have no idea how to teach a horse to lunge, really.

He is still being an idiot, he tries to bolt, kicks out at me, nearly kicks me in the head (as in I saw his corks in front of my face and felt dust come from his hoof onto my face). So my trainers assistant trainer helps me.

She worked WONDERS with him. Apparently Ringo has no respect for space and has been taking advantage of me. She lunged him (teaching him how to in the process) and got his respect without being mean. I really have admiration for her now. Like she worked miracles. He was kicking out, bolting, he charged her once.

After she was done, he was so much better - now that I had felt and seen the difference I realized he wasn't respectful enough of my 'bubble'. I was told to be firm, but not mean to him. I had to make him want my approval.

I was half-mad at him anyways, so it wasn't too hard. Until he started nickering at me (he had started the day before doing that). That was hard.

I also had a long talk with my trainer that day.

It took me a while to bathe him, get him uncorked, untack him, and all that crap, and my friend kind of left me there, and then got yelled at by her parents and came back. It really didn't bother me - I was in a state that nothing really did. I had already called my mom so she left again.

Jess won two 6ths in the 2'6" jumpers! =D

DAY 3: Second Day of Showing
I didn't show today, Dececia just lunged Ringo again, he was much better that time.
Jess had a freak fall - her horse tripped a stride from the fence, tried to jump it, crashed through it, Jess fell off. She went to the hospital after being checked out by a medic just to be safe, and she ended up having a sprained hand, and a mild concussion.

It was one of those falls where it wasn't the horse's or the rider's fault, and it couldn't really have been avoided.

DAY 4: Third Day of Showing
I scratched my jumper classes, because my trainer didn't want to push me. I wanted to do them though, really I did. I was over my fear, and I just wanted to show.

I had to quickly go buy a new show shirt (first one I pulled off the rack fit, and was 100 dollars off haha).

Ringo stopped for the first time EVER in the warm up ring. He took off at a REALLY bad distance and barely cleared the jump. The second time around he stopped, third time on he was fine.

We got a 9th in the hunter class (gah so close) and I did my first jog (I was in the 3'0 children's hunter class, which always has a jog). It was alright, I had a HUGE blister on my foot so I had to suck it up for pain (I was limping at the walk in my boots).

I got 6th in the medal (out of quite a few people). I was really happy with that day.

Jess came and rode Silky to make sure she was mentally okay and if Silky was okay as well. They both were, thankfully.

Jen had a rail, but Polar was really really good.

DAY 5: Fourth Day of Showing
Today was the 5k Team Challenge Grand Prix, and we were walking the course. It wasn't too bad. It was Jess, Jen and I on a team, and there was another team from our trainer as well.

Jess waited until AFTER the walk to tell Larissa she wasn't riding because of the fact she had been throwing up last night. Larissa was pretty miffed I think, and told Jess to go talk to the medic because she should be in a hospital if she's throwing up. Then she scrambled to find us a rider, and did, thankfully, but I had to be moved down a height. So I BOOKED it to get ready. Ringo hadn't even had breakfast yet, and he looked so confused. There was no time for lunging. I trotted down to the ring, cantered, jumped two jumps, and went in the ring.

It was an AWESOME round. Like freaking amazing. He was so fast, clean, and listened to me so well! I was SO SO SO happy with him. My round got HUGE cheers and clapping. I was ecstatic with his performance.

Our 2'9" rider apparently got eliminated...And Jen was lightning fast with four faults. So if we would've gone clear with our 2'9" rider we would've gotten in to the top 6!! We were so disappointed.

I got 6th in eq on the flat, and Ringo stopped twice, getting me eliminated in the jumping class. And my horse doesn't stop. Like, ever. The footing in front and after the jumps SUCKED though. Like 4 inches of mud - he slid into the second fence he stopped at. He stopped at the second fence, a vertical, I got him over it with kicking, and was kicking all down the line, but it was like he had no energy.

And that's what it was - he was so tired from yesterday, and we had cut his feed (not my idea) so he just had nothing left. It sucked but at least it wasn't disobedience.

After my parents and I went to my BO's trailer/motorhome to have a BarBQ with them. It was awesome. Jen and I did night check. The people from Larissa's barn (well a few of them) didn't clean up, or wrap their horses. I was annoyed.

DAY 6: Final Day of Showing
I was in the 10k Grand Prix, and it was another AWESOME round. He was lightning fast, he listened so well, and jumped clean. It was awesome.

Except I started doing the jump off course (the first two fences were the same), and circled (tightly) to go back to fence three (I hadn't passed it really, or gone near it, the next fence in the jump off was 4), and then went. I got four faults for that, which pissed me off to no end - at myself. I was so so so so mad at myself.

My hutner went well, at least. I got a 4th (out of 20ish horses) in the under saddle class. Then he was running out of gas again, and I just concentrated on getting him over everything in the hunter ring, which he did. I was ONE POINT away from the callback, and the cut off scores were TIED. I was sooooo mad lol. But we finished on a good note.

He loaded so well - no pulling, first try. I was so surprised.

When we got home, he was so happy. He GALLOPED down to Mindy, Courage, and Kaz. Polar did too. It was cute. All the horses were galloping - even Silky! It was awesome.

So all in all the show was a learning one. I had fun.

Coming To Jesus

2008-07-09T22:01:00.003-06:00

So, the horse show.

Preparations went smoothly. Mane pulled, legs clipped, tack cleaned, stuff packed, into the trailer, it's all good.

Horse was an idiot for loading, per usual. When the other two horses loaded he FREAKED and started bucking and trying to bolt. He loaded after about 4 tries, then decided he couldn't back up into his stall (he kept banging into the side of the trailer.

We got to the show unloaded all our stuff....and guess what? NO SHAVINGS UNTIL 10 AM THE NEXT MORNING. So we had to split 4 bags between three stalls. Oh joy oh bliss. And we're separated for some reason, but that isn't so bad. Silky is way up at one end of the stall row, and Polar and Ringo are next to the tack room at the other end.

We're also the second farthest row! YAY! Not. At least we have hose access, and the manure pile and food wagon aren't too far away.

Schooling went really well actually. I walked him several times that morning, including by the rings and around them and such. He was pretty good - no spooking or bolting or anything. And he was a little rambunctious in the hunter schooling, but he was pretty good. In the jumper he was AWESOME! I was so proud of him! We did the 2'9" and the 3'0". Clear round ribbons, YAY!

So fast forward to today (OMG HAD DEJA VU!). Morning was good, I cleaned his stall took him for a walk, watched Jess's rounds, learned my course. I thought Ringo and I actually had a change in our jumper class (my only class for the day). We walked it, we had a plan...

So I tack up Ringo, we head down to the ring to watch a few more rounds. He's standing there nice and quietly, and all of a sudden he just EXPLODED. He went straight up, bucked, and tried to bolt away. I had him under control and he stopped for a bit. Then AGAIN. Explosion. And then one right after that. So I go to the warm up ring to work out the jinks.

He blew up four or five times when I was just hacking him. Then he was working well and we started jumping. He was really good, we had to work on straightness a bit. He was jumping well, a little BIG but it was alright. Then he exploded twice again.

I finished the warm up but I don't know what happened to me. Maybe it was the lack of food and dehydration and sunstroke and lack of sleep, I don't know. But something in me snapped and I just randomly broke down. And I DO NOT do that. Looking back I'm absolutely ashamed and wished I had just shut my mouth and gone in the ring. But for some reason I had to be a big baby and I didn't.

I told my trainer I was frustrated and scared and sick of this and pretty much everything about Ringo. She said go lunge him and maybe I could do the 3'3"s. So I said okay.

So I go start lunging him. Now, I've been trying to teach him how, but he isn't very good at it. He kicked, bucked, and took off at first, then I got him going quite nicely, and I again, I thought progress!

Nope.

EXPLOSION. So I chased him around. He nearly kicked me several times, and twice VERY NEARLY got my head. Like, as in I saw his corks close to my face and had dirt from his hoof hit my face.

He did it again and I just couldn't do it. I started crying again, and my trainer took over. Ringo had a 'coming to Jesus'. She taught him respect (NOT cruelly) her, and how to lunge. His bridle fell off.

I led him back with instructions to not be mean, but firm with him, and to only pat him when he's good. No dealing with him more then I have to - business like. Or that's the impression I got, which wasn't hard to do.

Until everytime I walk up he nickers at me, and looks at me so adoringly. I just wanted to sit down and cry.

And that whole thing made me miss someone I've been trying to shove from my mind. And I hate I miss them. And I do.

I'm so frustrated. I've worked SO hard. SO freaking hard. And it still isn't coming together.

Is lunging and riding hard every show worth it just for a CHANCE (not a probably one at that) at winning a few 50 cent ribbons and that? Is riding in a show to show off my skills worth the hassle and money?

Right now, I'm thinking not. And I hate that, because I think I could really enjoy showing.

I'm just tired of this. And I just want to cry and cry and cry. Ugh.

ETA: Ringo also managed to cork himself (not badly thankfully). And some other stuff happened.

Ringo was much more respectful after his lunging session. Like there was a huge noticeable difference. He was confused when I wouldn't touch him though. Partly I was mad at him. And disappointed. And hurt.

Every time I start to trust him he breaks it, and it's annoying.

I miss everyone so much. So so much.

And I know I won't give up with this, but I seriously thought about discarding showing, Ringo, riding english, riding, horses.

Ugh.

Vet Shadowing

2008-07-03T20:27:00.002-06:00

So today by 9AM I was at a vetrinary clinic.

I had arranged to job-shadow one of the vets at this clinic about a week earlier. Her husband and my dad were in the military together so, by default, they talked, and I ended up with his wife's number haha.

Once I got a shirt thing and met everyone the FIRST thing we did was look at a dog that had passed away the night before. He had come in for some surgery and obviously the surgery hadn't worked. There was something wrong with his liver or kidney.

There were three dental surgeries scheduled, two of them minor and basically just cleanings, the last had EIGHT extractions. It was interesting to watch, that's for sure. I watched them do everything from prepare them for pre-med to helping the animals come out of it.

I helped hold a Doxer who needed his toenails clipped and really didn't like it.

Two dogs came in with collapsed hind ends (separate cases). At the same time. We used a trolley to get them back, then I held onto Emily, the SWEETEST dog ever and just sat there petting her and talking to her while they put the other dog down.

Emily had xrays and was put into a big kennel, I'm not sure what's happening to her. I think they might end up putting her down. =( She had this cute little teddy bear with her. It was adorable. She looked older though, at least.

We put a cat down that had severe bladder/urinary issues. That was sad. His name was Bandit. He was a cute cat, pissed off at everyone but still, I liked him.

I went with the vet into the appointment rooms to watch her with the CUTEST kitten EVER, and this really friendly 11 year old dog who looked like she was 4. She loved me for some reason haha.

We didn't stop at all.

I totally admire every single one of those people. Like, WOW. I can't even voice words for it. It was a spectacular experience, and they invited me back again.

Summer

2008-06-29T12:56:00.003-06:00

Well school's out, exams done. I'm officially in grade 11 now. Scary. I have to rearrange my entire schedule. Haha.
I think I already did a reflection post. This year was my best year ever, and I had the happiest time of my life in it. Like I actually have a time period where I was happiest. I never did before, mainly because I'm a happy person lol.

So far this summer I've hung out with one of my friends, and we've gotten lost, gone to the horse store multiple times, attended Spruce Meadows a few times (I got some great pictures), and blasted music. Oh and drove her little brother around a bit. It's pretty sweet.

And 'sweet' seems to be my new word. No idea why.

Ringo's been doing excellently. Our lessons have been going really well, and he's jumping the best he ever has. He loves it so much. Our lessons have become more regular again, thankfully.

We went for a trail ride the other day and he was amazing. He listened there and BACK (amazingly!) and it was wonderful. He just wanted to go go go, and so did I. He didn't buck or try to bolt, the first time EVER. I'm so proud of him.

It makes me feel FREE to do that. To run with my horse. Nothing but us and the sky and the wind and the grass. I love it. If anyone ever asks me why I ride that is the simpelist answer: because it makes me feel free.

I don't have to worry about grades, or drama, or chores, or getting a job, or my future, or ANYTHING when I'm even with my horse. I can cry into his neck or go gallop in a field or go jump whenever I want to. He is mine, for life. I would do anything for him. Even give up other stuff I love. I don't need a camera, or a computer, or anything. Just him.

Sorry, but he's really pulled through for me in the last while. I've been stressed out, and he's always a constant. Yeah he might be a brat, and he might buck sometimes, but he's always there. And I am forever grateful.

I found out stuff regarding a friend. I don't know if it's true (it's not bad, just an explanation), and I have two sources who 'confirm' it. It would explain a lot, but open up even more questions. I don't even know if I should keep talking to him - but yet I have to. I like him too much to extinguish connections with him, and...I can't even explain it. It's a feeling I have. Whether or not it's an actual feeling or just me being stubborn and just not wanting to let go, I don't know.

My other friend has a lot of issues going on, mainly circulating religion and her parents. They are restricting her beyond belief - to the point of not seeing friends, no door, etc, and she's a GOOD kid. Good grades, no parties, no drinking, no drugs...She's an amazing person. It drives me crazy to see her hurting like this - she loves her family but they will NOT listen to her and what she wants. It's probably going to come to drastic measures, but I haven't been able to talk to her about since they screen her msn convos (yeah, I know).

In other horse news, I registered for my first show since the disastrous last schooling show. It's an A show (my trainer refused to take me to a little schooling show, claiming since she didn't know the barn it must be unsafe and such, sigh), and I'm entered in 3'0 jumpers, hunters, and medal/eq classes. I have a class a day, but no more then three a day. It's from Tuesday - Sunday (next next week) and I'm really excited for it. The scary thing is I'm entered in a 'Nation's Cup' $5000 class, and a Grand Prix $10 000 class. I'm really excited though, I'm sure it'll be freaking awesome. I'm hoping Ringo will be calm, and we'll get to stable inside where it is the coolest and quietest. I need to figure out what I'm bringing soon. I need all my horse stuff, and then all the stuff for me to stay down there the whole week. Driving back and forth would just be a headache and cost a lot of money. We luckily have a nearby place to shower and recharge away from the show if need be, and our friends are bringing feed and their motorhome (as well as their horses haha) so we'll be all set. We split a tack and feed stall, so hopefully we'll get those.

I just came back from the barn, and it was HOT. So I rode bareback for like, twenty minutes, then hosed him off. He's so cute. Lol.

That's all for now.

A Bit of Reflection

2008-06-21T06:25:00.002-06:00

Life goes by so fast.

Truly.

I'm done grade 10. And if feels like time flew. I have only one exam left, then I am DONE. In less then two months I can drive. I'm done drivers ed.

This past year was...the best. The beginning was good, the middle was good, the middle-end the best time of my life, and the end, well okay, that sucked, in some ways, but it was good too.

A lot happened this year. It was a lot of firsts for me.

I don't regret one thing. I miss a few things, but, overall, it was the best year ever.

How can you top ENGLAND? With your friends? Impressing an international audience? Being the best behaved band? You can't.

I am very lucky in my life.

Ringo's doing well. We've had a bit more lessons recently, and on Wednesday he was amazing. He was jumping out of his skin, and it was tons of fun.

Tomorrow we're going on our first XC course. I'm really excited yet terrified at the same time. I'm not afraid of the jumps - I'm afraid of being able to control Ringo. He gets nuts sometimes, and with all that open space...I'm scared he'll throw me and get hurt.

But anyways, I'm excited.

I'm writing a story and I've done an intro, and two chapters. I can't wait to finish it. It's so much fun to write!

I gotta run though, time to go to the barn.

2008-06-01T16:47:00.002-06:00

One of my favorite barn people left today, to go join her friend at another (VERY NICE) barn. I used to ride at that barn waaay back when I first started riding, but now it has new owners and such. It's a gorgeous facility, and currently they are breeding some really nice warmbloods. There are a lot of excellent riders and horse people there, and I hope I can go meet some of them. =P I'm going to miss her, and her horse, but we have plans to do some three day eventing (I know - ME), and such together, plus her new barn is exceptional.

Our plans are to go school a cross country course sometime in June, and perhaps do an event in July or August. I can't wait! I'm pretty sure Ringo will do really well (he isn't afraid of jumps, or water), but I do have a concern about keeping his excitement under control. He's probably going to be W-I-R-E-D. But that's okay, I'm very very excited. Normally I'm terrified of jumps that if I hit they won't budge, but it's also exhilarating.

My lesson yesterday went really well - Ringo was jumping out of his skin, and we did really well. The jumps weren't too high, maybe 3'3" MAYBE 3'6" on the oxer. But it was tons of fun. Polar was freaking out though, to the point I was terrified watching him go. By the end though they managed to get it working for them, thankfully.

I might go to a show in July - it's been a while since I've been to a show, and almost a year since I've been to an outside show. I asked to go to a little schooling show first, but my trainer won't go. I'm debating just going but I don't think she'd be happy, and nor do I think my parents would be happy either. Oh well, I guess. The show I'm supposed to go to is two weeks long, a 3 star (B) event. I think the only non-5 star (A) show the barn is holding lol. It's still going to be huge, I'm sure.

Before my friend left, myself, her, and one of our other friends went on a nice long trail ride. We talked a lot, galloped down a path, had Ringo freak out and try to gallop again, went swimming (my horse splashed us all, therefore getting us soaking wet), and then went home. It was really nice. I'm going to miss that too.

No More Roadblock

2008-05-28T23:55:00.003-06:00

Finally, Ringo and I conquered a huge road block.

One of my older barn friends helped me properly get him on the bit, bending, going forward, while still keeping my position proper. I FINALLY got it - she's the only one who I've been able to do it with. I've been struggling with Ringo's pulling for so long, and now - its EASY to fix. It still needs tons of work of course, but even in the half an hour I spent on it - an AMAZING difference.

We also went on a trail ride today, with another one of my barn friends. It was awesome - the first real NICE (as in no rain) day for almost two weeks! We went for a long ride, galloped, went through the water, and talked a lot. All the horses were excellent - Ringo did try to take off a few times and protested when I slowed him, but he was really good. We went through the water, and all of them were excellent. Ringo LOVED it once again and splashed a lot. He got us all SOAKED. It was so much fun though.

It's sad because one of them is leaving soon, and I absolutely love riding with her. We're hoping to go to an event together, because I really want to try three day eventing. Ringo will be excellent at it I think. He's fearless and athletic - the only problem I foresee is controlling his excitement.

The one bad thing is that my trainer hasn't been around much lately - and we're technically not allowed to jump (past like small X's) without a trainer, and Ringo misses it, and so do I. Most of us don't really follow the rule, but we always have someone there. I know I'm good enough to jump Ringo, and Ringo is definitely capable. I of course wouldn't be jumping a 3'3" course or anything, but you know. It's frustrating because this is what happened to my last trainer - too little time. And I got left behind, which is frustrating, although I'm much better equipped to handle it this year. It was suggest I just go to a small show - and I might. I doubt my parents will agree, nor anyone else, but I want to do a show - for fun. To get Ringo back into it. To get ME back into it. And I think I'd like the independence of it. I'm thinking about it.

I've started posting again on Deviant Art... Find me at: www.cursivenight.deviantart.com
I haven't got much up yet, but I will.

When Do You Sell?

2008-05-22T20:54:00.002-06:00

How do you know when to sell your horse?

When you never see it? When you can't financially support it? When you don't like it? When you don't have enough time/money/resources to fix a problem?

I think the hardest thing ever is to decide to sell your horse or pony.

I had a friend who just sold her first pony, mainly because she was getting too tall for him in general, and too tall for him in the show ring. She was devestated, and put it off for a while, but did it, eventually. He sold in their barn, and she still sees him every day, and rides him sometimes too. She misses him a lot.

My first horse, a leasee, I was forced to let go of. He was sick, I was so unhappy at the barn, we were being way overcharged, and nothing was giving. Then I bought Ringo (and hell began for a while lol). That was the HARDEST thing I ever did - my heart broke for the first time, walking away the last time. I haven't seen him since, unfortunately. Ironically they're selling all their stock, and I wonder if he's for sale. My parents already said a resounding 'No!' to buying him, but I still hope....

Razz (my first horse) taught me so much. He taught me to respect horses, to ask, to work with horses. He taught me how to work through ground problems, how to ride a spooky horse, how to do dressage. We had a pretty amazing bond. When I got him he was nervous, scary...When we left he was so calm - the only time he as really bad was when he was alone in the barn. I miss him sometimes, even though I know I'd out grown his skills then - at least a jumper. But a big part of me wants to go buy him back, now, and see what we could do.

I love Ringo with all my heart - we've been through so darn much together. But sometimes it feels like I'm not getting anywhere. Like we're moving backwards, or holding each other back. I really dislike that feeling.

We've overcome so much (fear of bucking, the bucking itself, trailering, trail rides) but it still feels like I haven't exactly gotten anywhere.

It doesn't help I don't know where I want to go in the horse world, or what I want to do exactly.

Nor does it help I've been really depressed lately.

I'm ashamed to say I haven't ridden in a week now - I was away for the long weekend, the weather was SO scary on tuesday, and I just ...didn't on Wednesday. Tonight I had a stupid driving lesson, and tomorrow I have to play at a Grad thing that I REALLY don't want to go to - for personal reasons. It's going to be really hard getting through tomorrow night.

The one thing I want from Ringo is a true bond - where he'd do anything for me, and would walk up to me and nuzzle me and all that. I've worked hard to do it too. We're so close - but not there. And I don't think we're ever going to get there, and it's frustrating. He's just not that kind of horse - he is such a 'dude' or a 'guy'.

I get discouraged sometimes, and since riding and horses are so important to me it hurts 1000 times more when I get something wrong, or people brag. I should be so much farther ahead in my riding.

I wish I had a 'gift' with horses, but I know I don't, and it's frustrating.

I have no goals, or dreams, and I wish I did. But at the same time the few times I HAVE had them they've been crushed.

I've been considering selling Ringo, but I don't know if I can actually do it.

I tried talking to a few of my horsey friends, but they really weren't any help. I'm kinda afraid to talk to my barn owner or my trainer about it - just kinda awkward, they'll think I'm some whiny kid or something. And my parents - no way. Yikes.

I just don't know. And with everything else I NEED something to go right in riding, and it's just really not.

Horses As Comforters

2008-05-07T21:52:00.002-06:00

One of the many reasons I seek the company of horses is their calming influence, their listening skills (or maybe simply the fact they can't talk back haha), and their sense of knowing...

When I have a bad day, or something bad happens, my first instinct is get to the barn. Unfortunately, until I can drive, I have to repress emotions until I do. But when I'm out at the barn, it either DOESN'T MATTER, or I can just let go - even if others are there (though I do take care to hide it).

After a particularly bad Tuesday (as in the worst day in my life so far - or very close), I just went to my horse, called him, we met in his field, and then threw my arms around him and cried. He stood there, then shoved his head in the halter, and led me slowly (eating along the way) up towards the barn. The horses bolted forward, so I quickly took off his halter, not wanting to have to hold on to him because I really didn't feel very strong. He walked a bit faster, but kept his eye on me, and as soon as they were done walked right over to me. Well I did have part of a carrot, but I'd like to believe it was not that. Lol.

He followed completely willingly, and tried so hard when I rode him, even though he was fresh. We rode outside for a bit, then I took him on a trail ride. We went for a short gallop, and that did help. He didn't even buck ONCE!!! And he walked on a LOOSE REIN the WHOLE way back. Even when I hugged his neck. I was so surprised and impressed. My baby is so good to me.

He seems to be perfectly fine injury wise. It's still a scab, but a small one and the hardness is decreasing nominally. His head bumps are still there but slowly disappearing.

I gave him a good scratch today. He quite enjoyed it.

For some reason the horses were in REALLY early today, but that might have been the hail, or to keep the stall confined mare company. Poor girl has some kind of internal bruise that's bleeding and pooling in a disgustingly squishy HUGE lump on her hindquarters. She was banging at her water bucket so loudly I actually went to see what the heck she was doing. It was empty, so I filled it up. She drank most of it before I had put it on it's latch. She normally has two but I think they are in the trailer or something. I also gave them all carrots, which they all enjoyed immensely. I enjoyed eating half of one as well.

I'm surviving, and I'm okay, but at the same time, not.

Yuck.

Derby Tragedy

2008-05-04T15:54:00.002-06:00

The 134th Kentucky Derby was one by a colt named Big Brown.

The second place winner, the only filly, Eight Belle, did fantastically - until shortly after the finish line, she collapsed because of two broken ankles/fetlocks. She was euthanized no more then 7 minutes after the race.

She couldn't stand, because she broke two ankles - on her two front legs, and couldn't get into the ambulance. Her injuries were very painful.

I feel so bad for that beautiful filly. She really was an amazing girl.

Horse racing as a whole, to me at least, isn't a BAD thing - there is nothing wrong with racing a horse. It is the people in the industry that give it a bad name - over breeding, breeding for speed and not for solidness, starting too young, pushing too hard, pushing too fast, drugging, etc.

The Thoroughbreds today, particularly American ones it seems, are getting lighter, faster, and more susceptible to break down. It's a tragedy that can be prevented.

No matter what ANYONE says, those horses are being started to young, worked to hard [too young], and have way too much expected of them. They should be allowed to be horse, for at least a few years, and be allowed to grow up and develop both mentally and physically.

Something that would really help would be holding (if not eventually moving it) a 'triple crown' prestige race for FIVE year olds - or even four. Decreasing the winning amounts in young horse races and increasing it in the older horse races. That in itself would do WONDERS.

There is always going to be accidents, of course, but we could greatly decrease them - and not just in horse racing.

Life Is So Complicated

2008-04-28T00:59:00.003-06:00

It's been a long, pretty awful week. Nothing is going particularly right. Or really right at all.

I've been so nervous giving the needles to Ringo, which is ridiculous because I had to give him penicillin before, and these needles are smaller. Tonight and last night I was much better. I just -did- it. If I think too much I guess I psych myself out. But I haven't been brave enough to do the hind quarters yet. I don't think I will. Which means twice more in the neck. Ouch. My poor baby. He's being pretty good about it - he stands, even when I use beta-dine on his leg. We've reduced wrapping to just a polo wrap, and there is no heat (or little) or swelling in his lower limbs. Which is really, really good. He managed to temporarily lose his wraps, but we found them - disgustingly covered in mud and much. Yuck. But the good news is he's looking like he's sound! Tomorrow I'm planning on hopping on for a walk, MAYBE a trot. He was free lunging well, so I guess its time to bring him back. He's gonna be hyper - the weather melted all the snow, no blankets, and he hasn't been ridden in a week. Ah!

I'm also not working at the barn for the next three weeks because of driving school. It's interesting. Lol. The guy teaching us is really good, but boy does he have road rage - or at least with his horn. Wore out 4 already. Wow. After that comes driving lessons, then a few months till I can take the test.

School's been a nightmare. So many tests, work, and crazyness. My science class is so stupid and annoying I go in with dread and come out with a headache and having learned nothing. Ugh.

I need a big break to be honest. I'm just so sick of everything. And I want some things to happen that just don't seem to be, and I don't know how to stop things from falling apart. Because that's what they are doing.

I have a friend who is going down the wrong, scary road. What do I do? I have no idea.

I did ride Miles on Friday. He was really REALLY hyper - prancing, leaping, almost bucking. It was interesting. Today I brought him in and groomed him, and rode him bareback at the walk. I didn't have time for anything else.

The barn politics are on the up as well. Ugh. I want it to go back how it used to be. Whether that be february (after the 14th, maybe the 20th or something?) or even back when I was six and nothing mattered.

Injuries

2008-04-23T00:22:00.002-06:00

On Saturday, Ringo came in with a very fresh cut on his leg - along the line of his elbow, just in the middle of the outside of his leg. Well, I didn't think much of it, although it was kinda nasty. I cleaned it thoroughly with water and left it. He was great that day when I rode him.

The next day I come out and he seems a bit stiff, so I see if he's lame. Oh yeah. At the trot, anyways, and not too bad but its still noticeable. His cut also was QUITE swollen, rock hard, and he didn't want to be touched. I debated calling the vet, but wanted the barn owner to look at it first (and wanted to avoid unnecessary vet costs), so I just iced it, put some Green Wound Cream on it, and had a weird wrap thing around it. Well they iced it for me again that night, and called to say that it didn't look to bad.

On Monday they iced for me again (I don't go out on Mondays usually) and cleaned it out for me. Today, I went out and his entire leg was puffed up, hot, and the cut was pussing a bit, HUGELY swollen, and hot to the touch. I called the vet immediately, and he was VERY stiff walking on it, though thankfully he was putting weight on it like normal.

The vet arrived, felt around his leg, then went IN the wound (we needed a tranq for that), and then told me that as long as the infection wasn't in the elbow bone area, we would be okay. If it did, however, get in there....There wasn't much we could do. Thankfully it seems he just missed it, at least for now, so no infection is in there. She gave him a local anesthetic and examined the wound more closely - a puncture wound (though he never tore his blanket...) going at least two inches deep. She opened it up a bit more to give it more drainage, cleaned it out with a solution, gave him a shot of a stronger anti-biotic then penicillin (xeno something?) and some bute.

I get to give Ringo the shots of the anti-biotic for 8 days, wrap his leg, he gets 1 gram of bute per day...though thankfully he gets to go outside.

My poor baby was SO good for it. He stood, although he was a bit pushy (he wanted OUT of there), he listened, and watched me. He rested his head on my shoulder a bit, the poor guy. He tried to BITE the vet when she was digging in his wound (don't blame him) but I stepped in front and he stopped.

I'm figuring riding isn't an option haha, but my friend said I can ride her horse in a lesson tomorrow and saturday, and whenever I want friday and sunday. It was very very nice of her - we both won - she gets her horse excersized and I get a horse to ride. Her horse needs the mileage as she trained him herself and is going to sell him soon, so she said it'd be good for him. I've ridden him once before and he was a little angel. =)

So I'm worried about Ringo, but just trying to take it as it comes. Hopefully he'll heal quickly....

Controversy

2008-04-18T23:22:00.002-06:00

I'm part of the FUGLY blog/forum community (http://www.fuglyhorseoftheday.blogspot.com), and recently/currently there was a young girl asking for conformation critiques on her 'rare and beautiful' horses.

On that board everyone has a reputation for being blunt, and slightly argumentative, but I guess the girl didn't realize that. It resulted in her proving herself to be (at least online) a slightly illiterate horse abuser over 200 pages on two or three separate threads. She has a youtube account with videos of her tying her horses down (and not just making them fall, but tying them down), using a bungee cord to attach a horses chin to its chest pretty much, and her dancing of a lame two year old (??? not confirmed). She threatened a few of the posters apparently, insulted us, lied...the list could go on. People called AC and child services apparently. I'm sorry she's got problems, but really my sympathy is for her horses. If you just don't KNOW and no one's offered help - its understandable. You can't physically do it, weren't prepared (shame on you), or something like that...okay.

People are offering her help, politely, rudely, whatever. They pointed her in the direction of books, youtube videos, gave her advice on the forum, told her to read the BLOG... But she just didn't listen. That makes me REALLY think lowly of her because it implies she knows her training rituals aren't pristine or correct or kind, but she does it anyways. That I cannot stand, and there is NO excuse for.

I posted comments on a few of the youtube videos. I really don't care about the riding skills, or the prettiness of the horses...It's more about the welfare, and the fact those horses are going to get truly hurt or hurt her or someone. Now one thing though, they are healthy (otherwise). So kudos for that I guess.

My rant, because it just really irked me.

Turns Out

2008-04-17T00:54:00.003-06:00

Part of the reason Ringo was on his forehand so much was because he was lame.

I was in my lesson tonight and he was really on his forehand and leaning on my hand AGAIN - which he usually doesn't do to that extreme, and if he does its for one night. He was also not bending, and really stiff...

Well his hind quarters were VERY sensitive, and his hind legs (especially his near) were almost 'hinging'.

I feel very very guilty for working him harder yesterday - he didn't feel off, and I assumed he was just misbehaving or not having a good night. =(

He's getting tomorrow off anyways, because I'm going to a play, and I'll work him lightly for the rest of the week. If he hasn't improved in a few days we'll call the vet. I hope its nothing and it heals quickly.

He always seems to injure himself when I don't ride him for a day. And I'm out there 6 days a week. Riding or giving him some form of exercise. And if not 6 days then its definitely 5.

There's been a lot of horses coming and going (as well as people) on the farm. Since the beginning of the year we've had one boarder with her two old mares leave, one boarder sell her horse (they weren't working out) and she just bought another, one is slowly getting around to selling her horse, and will be buying another one, three boarders come, two boarders (sisters) come, sell one of their horses and are in the process of acquiring a new one...Its nuts. Although we have a lot more people, it hasn't really become more busy. It's still mostly three people I see. It's nice, I guess. I'm the longest boarder now - 1 1/2. Same time I've owned Ringo.

A good barn is SO important, but it also depends what you want. Some people want people to do, and decide everything for them - unless they feel the need to intervene. Some people want others to have NOTHING to do with their horse. Most people seem to want a middle degree.

I could do pretty much anything, from totally taking care of him to letting people do things. As long as I get to make decisions, have final say, etc. But Ringo recieves such amazing care - they love their horses, they know their stuff, they are such nice people... barn drama isn't tolerated, nor is abuse or mistreatment. They'll HELP you through issues without being pushy. I love that barn so much. I can go for a trail ride along roads, in pastures, I can ride inside or outside. Feed quality is good.

I think EVERY barn should have access to this:
-shelter
-water (CLEAN!)
-quality hay/grass year round
-clean pen/stall/pasture
-quality food
-room to move around in/letting horses be horses
-farrier services (the barn doesn't have to provide this but they should have someone that they can at least recommend)
-vet services (")
-happy people
-happy horses

Attitude can be almost as important as the thing a barn provides. You could maybe bear a barn that you hated every person in, but your horse got wonderful care. But you certainly wouldn't enjoy it for long. But nor would you stay (or you shouldn't anyways, unless you don't really have any other option) at a barn who has the nicest people, but your horse's health or mentality is suffering.

But like I said, different people like different things.

Personally, I would want a barn with heat, an indoor arena, access to trails, a big pasture for my horse to be a horse in, and all the things I listed above. I'm very lucky to have such a good barn.

I live in an area where there is a large concentration of horses. We have a lot of barns - a few world class facilities. Theres everything from the dumps to the world's best. You have private barns, show barns, lesson barns, breeding barns, ranches, training barns...There is a LOT. Or at least I think there is. And boy, you screw up (like starving a horse, beating it, etc) it gets around FAST.

I think it takes a lot of skill and management to run a barn. I wouldn't mind doing that at all. I like the management aspect of it, and I would want to give my boarders what I would want. But of course running a barn would be terribly expensive. I think I'll train horses first. If I ever get to that point...It seems such a long way off.

But anyways, opinions on barns, barn owners, etc anyone?

Pull, Pull, Pull

2008-04-15T23:29:00.002-06:00

My horse loves to pull. Well usually anyways. He's built a bit downhill, so its natural for him to be on his forehand. He CAN get underneath himself (he does it when we jump and occasionally on the flat), but it can be a bit of a struggle. I try to be really light handed, and it works in the walk (he doesn't pull in the walk anymore), and the trot usually, but the canter... Not so much. If anyone has any advice with horses that are on their forehand and like to pull...please share!

I know you're supposed to sit up and back, and use your leg to push them through your hand. Continually half halt, don't give them something to grab on to....Leg yields, transitions, shoulder in, haunches in...turn on the haunches. Maybe I should have done the turn on the haunches.

In the trot I can get him, but the canter it can be a fight. He won't bend around my inside leg, he will go faster, and when I try to slow him down he goes pully, I try to push him up through my hand and he pulls or drops something or the like. It's slightly frustrating, but oh well.

I rode Miles today, to see how he would react to other riders. He was awesome, she's done an amazing job with him. He's still green, but man does he have potential. He bent, went on the bit, did his transitions well...I could go on. He is such a sweetheart on the ground, and he's just the same when you ride him. Next time I'll get to jump him, which should be totally awesome.

Spring is still in the air, but the weather isn't supposed to hold up. Not surprising. It is only April, and this is Canada. We've had snow every month of the year. It's pretty cool when you have snow in July. And August. Twice. Lol.

I'm going to my school's play on Thursday, so no riding unfortunately. Even though I wanted to go, and it was my decision I still feel a pang of guilt and disappointment when I can't go riding. But I have a riding lesson tomorrow, so that should be fun. I have to talk to my trainer about horse shows, planning, and my activities. I was supposed to go to a show in May, but grad and my friends birthday wish to take me to Montana has slightly interfered. I hope I get a show in before school is out haha.

Here's to hoping!

Spring Fever

2008-04-13T16:00:00.002-06:00

Spring is mostly upon us (besides the foot of snow that fell on us a few days ago...but it's gone at least). Ringo's been a bit nuts. I tried to take him on a trail ride the other day, but we got off the farm and he was spinning, bolting, bucking...Not to the extreme, thankfully, but enough to make me cringe at the ride home, where he is usually prancy and likes to bolt. So I made him go to the end of the road, past the SCARY kids who were playing (and they even stopped and asked to pet him, which I obliged, but got off and held my crazy gelding), and then back. We worked in the arena for a while, and he did settle down a bit.

The horses are exploding with hair (especially the unclipped ones), I can take off my jacket and even my sweater, no one has any blankets on, Ringo ACTUALLY has sweat marks (he usually never does), and the horses in the big pasture are wound up and eager to gallop. It's actually kind of amusing.

Ringo seems a bit better behaved then my old leased horse. I remember being TERRIFIED to take him to the pasture because his buddy would gallop madly around, he would try to bolt, and it was chaos. I always had my friend go with me and she'd throw open the gate just as I unhooked his lead line. We then bribed him over to the fence (after he'd bucked and ran around madly for a bit) with grass so I could slip his halter off. We were too scared to go in haha.

How do your horses react to spring? Are they more wild under saddle? On the ground? Or are they just their regular old selves?

I think I have spring fever too. I've been really restless lately. I can't wait until summer (well kinda), and until I can drive. There will be a lot of aimless days at the barn I think.

When You Ride A Horse, You Ride The Sky

2008-04-12T16:30:00.000-06:00

I've decided to actually start a blog that'll I'll keep up with, not like my lame MSN one. I figured if nothing else years later I can look back (hopefully unless the internet ruptures or google looses everything) and remember growing up with horses.

I could never fathom not having horses - not that I truly 'had' any till I was 13 or 14... but still. Even if you just have the love of a horse, the promise that if you're good enough you'll get riding lessons, or a pony, or get to go to a horse show to watch, it's enough. I can't remember when I started loving horses. I just always did. I remember my first horse back ride, even though I was only about 4 years old. I rode a palomino pony named Pumpkin, and my friend (my dad's business associate's daughter) rode a pinto pony named Patch. I remember grinning the whole time (I actually have a picture of it), and not wanting to get off. I've been told that when I was really little I climbed through a fence and was petting a big draft horse's legs. I don't remember that, unfortunately. So I guess it was ingrained in me, encouraged by my grandparents who would take me to a riding barn for lessons since I was six whenever I visited them.

If you're a true horse lover I don't think you ever outgrow it, even if you have to put school first, or something else that can better your life (or someone else's). I hope I never do. I couldn't imagine being without the friendship of a horse. They are my friends, my psychiatrists, my sport (and yes, riding is a sport. I'll debate that later), and my world. There's other things, but horses is one thing I could never give up. You can rarely get a human (if that's even possible) to share something with you like you share with a horse. There are quotes, such as the title of this post, that speak of a horse as perfection, something close to God, royal. I agree. You simply can't beat the horse in personality, willingness, beauty, power, grace...pretty much any positive adjective can be used on the horse.

Of course they aren't always graceful or perfect. My horse still has bumps on his head that are calcifications from bumping his head so many times. Thankfully they're almost gone as show season arrives. And there are the 'ugly' horses, the rebels...

But still, they are beautiful. Their spirit - their inner beauty. Their complete...love? of freedom. There's another very good saying: to me, horses and freedom are synonymous.

That is one of the truest quotes I've ever heard.

That's also probably why I oppose slaughter. It's a cruel, ungrateful end to the spectacular horse. Oh it may be 'necessary', but it is only that because we humans made it so. We breed and breed, and don't give our faithful companions a place to live out their days, or we want money. It's sad, that inhumane slaughter is the answer to the mess we created. I don't agree with it at all. There should be regulations set on breeders - you have to be approved maybe. Any colts intended for breeding MUST be approved? I don't know. There are too many un-gelded stallions, too many 'breed-able' (-coughgagcough-) mares, and too many ignorant people.